A Theological Perspective

We believe that sex, when practiced as God ordained, designed, and intended, is a pure, needful, and beautiful wonder of God's creation. We also believe that God designed and created sexuality not only for human procreation, but for human enjoyment and pleasure.-It is a gift from God. Despite some people's misperception that sexuality is virtually synonymous with sin, it is our religious belief that when practiced as God intended, between consenting persons of legal age, there is nothing evil or wrong with sex, nudity, or the human body.¹

As evidenced by Genesis 1:28, normal sexual relationships between men and women were designed, ordained, and commanded by God long before man sinned, when God told Adam and Eve to "be fruitful and multiply, and replenish the earth." A few verses later it says God "saw everything that He had made"-which included the first man and woman, as well as nudity and sex-"and behold, it was very good" (v.31). Nudity and pure and natural sexuality as God intended remain just as clean and wholesome as when God first created and ordained them.

The Bible explains that humankind fell from the sinless state it was originally created in when first the woman and then the man disobeyed God and willfully ate of the forbidden fruit from the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil. Prior to their fall into sin they were pure in spirit, and all things were seen by them as pure, just the way that God had made them. After their fall, however, much of what was pure and simple no longer appeared to be so. They became capable of looking at things in both good and evil ways. We believe that this sin-tainted perception, the ability to see or imagine evil even where there is no evil, has characterized humanity to this very day.

Shame about sexuality and nudity, therefore, is just one of the many side effects of the sinful fallen condition of humankind. To add to the problem, we believe there have been many unscriptural and erroneous teachings about sex disseminated by various "moral" authorities over the centuries that have left much of humanity confused, uncomfortable, and guilt-ridden about their own sexuality.

In spite of the inherently sinful nature of humankind, Jesus promises that through the regeneration of God's Holy Spirit, we can be "born again" and freed from the curse of sin and shame. The New Testament says, "To the pure, all things are pure" (Titus 1:15)². Therefore, although we have inherent weaknesses and imperfect attitudes toward sexuality and nudity because of sin, through Christ and His atonement we can regain purity of heart and attitude-not only toward our bodies and their natural functions, but many other aspects of life as well-for "Christ has redeemed us from the curse of the [Old Testament] law" (Galatians 3:13).

The Bible says in the Epistle of Paul to the Romans, "Whatsoever is not of faith is sin" (Romans 14:23 KJV) So although the above is our interpretation and belief of the Scriptures, we do not expect that other Christians who interpret these Scriptures differently will put them into practice in the same manner that we do. While our beliefs on sexuality are less conservative than most other Christians, we observe clear rules of discretion and sexual propriety in our communities.³

Marriage
God created and ordained the marriage union of man and woman. This marriage relationship is even used to represent His relationship with the believers, where Jesus is the Husband and the believers are collectively and individually depicted as His bride. We believe that marriage is the optimum situation and the ideal relationship for the parenting of children and the forming of stable families. In our communities the children and their needs are always given top priority. In cases of an unplanned pregnancy involving unmarried persons, it is considered ideal for the new father and mother to marry. If they decide not to marry, the man is responsible to care for the mother during her pregnancy and for the child until he is at least one year of age (The Charter 281-304).

Legally contracted monogamous marriages are the ideal for permanent relationships among our membership, and marriage is expected to be a commitment. Members who are of legal age to marry are free to do so. As in society at large, separations and divorce do occur in our communities (340-347).

Divorce
Married couples are encouraged to resolve their differences, especially for the sake of their children. Reconciliation, counseling, temporary separation, and other efforts are employed to help couples resolve their differences, but in the end if both parties agree to separate, they are free to do so. They may seek, if they choose, a legal divorce and an amicable arrangement for the custody of the children (348-351,384).

Personal Sexual Activity or Inactivity
We feel human sexuality is a normal and natural part of the human makeup as created by God. Therefore we do not believe there is any particular purpose, spiritual merit, or wisdom in trying to totally deny or suppress one's own sexuality, providing that it is not perverted or contrary to the Scriptures. We find no particular scriptural precedent for condemning personal sexual activities such as self-pleasuring through masturbation, and therefore feel it is a permissible activity if performed in private. If any person wishes to refrain from sexual activity or chooses not to marry, that is a personal decision, right, and prerogative.

Sexual Relationships Between Consenting Adults
We feel that sexual relationships and activities among adults are for the most part individual matters. However, members living in Family communities must agree to observe the following guidelines and principles, as outlined in the Family International's [the Family] Love Charter:

1. All members shall strive to adhere to the principle that we refer to as the Law of Love.⁴ This principle applies to all interactions with each other, not just sexual relationships. Briefly stated, when applied to sexual matters the Law of Love declares that all parties involved must consent to any sexual activity or relationship before it may be pursued.⁵ The relationship should not be harmful in any way to those involved, nor offend or run contrary to the expressed or implied wishes or personal conscience and convictions of any individual involved. No form of sexual harassment or coercion is permitted either by word or deed (6, 280).
2. Members are at all times to be mindful and respectful of the feelings of others and the effect their actions may have on those with whom they live in community. Sexual affections or activities are to be avoided in public areas of the Home (275).
3. Members may only engage in sexual activities that are mutually agreed upon by both partners and permitted for their age group as listed in The Charter (275-280).
4. Our communities do not prohibit sexual relations between a married person and someone other than his or her spouse, as long as all parties involved are in agreement. However, care is to be taken that such relationships do not affect the stability of their marriage or are in any way detrimental to the care and well-being of their, or other, children in the community. Again, we apply the principle of the Law of Love, that if such liberties are exercised, no participants or third parties should in any way be harmed or offended as a result (273).
5. Although polygamy has some basis in Scripture, and is legally permitted in some cultures, the Family has no official policy on polygamy, neither encouraging nor forbidding it as long as local legal requirements are adhered to.
6. Members may not engage in sexual perversions or any other sexual activity that is in any way harmful or dangerous (233, 304-307).
7. In the interest of health and safety, policies have been in place since 1987 disallowing full-time Family disciples permission to have sexual relationships with those who are not Family disciples or Family disciples who have joined or rejoined the Family for less than six months (233-234, 279-280).

Age Restrictions for Sexual Relationships
The Charter codifies limitations on age ranges of sexual interaction permitted to full-time Family disciples. As a fellowship active in over 100 countries, these limitations have been crafted bearing in mind the laws regulating sexual interaction in the majority of the countries around the world. These limitations are strictly enforced in the interest of the protection of Family minors. In countries where the legal age of consent is higher than the Family's Charter guidelines, the laws of the land must be adhered to (xx, 94).

Family young people assume full adulthood at 18, at which time they may engage in consensual sexual relations with members 18 and over. The Family's Charter permits 16- and 17-year-old members to engage in sexual interaction, if they so desire, but only with consenting partners ages 16 through 20.

Teenagers are educated as to the responsibility of engaging in sexual interaction, and those 16 and 17 years of age must have the permission of their parents or resident guardians to engage in any sexual relations. Teenagers aged 14 and 15 may date others aged 14 through 17, but only with parental permission; any sexual interaction is strictly limited to kissing and petting. No sexual interaction is permitted for those under the age of 14.

Members 18 years and older who have any sexual interaction with minors under 14 will be excommunicated from Family membership. It is an excommunicable offense for members 21 and over to engage in sexual contact or sexual relations with those under 18.

Protection of Minors
We are diametrically opposed to any form of abuse or exploitation of children whatsoever, and our membership is resolute in its agreement to abide by this position under penalty of excommunication from our fellowship.

In the United States, child abuse has been rated a national epidemic, with estimates ranging as high as one in six children having suffered sexual abuse.⁶ In April 1997, a survey in the Ukraine revealed that every fifth or sixth child of both sexes under 18 suffers from sexual harassment. In Japan, out of 350 women students surveyed, 68 percent had been sexually abused during childhood. In India, sex crimes have increased by 37 percent in the past five years.

These distressing statistics are no doubt repeated in many other countries. Children and adolescents are vulnerable and need special protection, a need that has been recognized by the Family. We have taken stringent measures to ensure that the minors in our communities are protected from any sort of abuse, whether physical, sexual, emotional, psychological, or otherwise. We are confident that the guidelines set down in The Charter for our communities in this regard afford our children a safe and protected environment.

Our strict policy disallowing sexual interaction between adults and underage minors was not always clearly stated in our literature. It was with great dismay that we came to realize that during a transitional stage of our movement, from 1978 until approximately 1985, there were cases when minors were subject to sexually inappropriate advances. In hindsight, we realize we should have anticipated potential problems arising from our liberal stance toward sexuality and established more stringent rules. This was corrected officially in 1986, when any contact between an adult and minor (any person under 21 years of age) was rendered an excommunicable offense. This was revised in March 2003 to 18 years of age.

The Family's success in protecting our children and ensuring their well-being has been documented by independent and court-appointed investigations in five different countries in the early 1990s of almost 700 children living in Family communities (approximately 17% of our children). After extensive physical, psychological, and educational testing, all of the children were found to be healthy with no sign of abuse. This speaks clearly to the enforcement of policies in place to safeguard children in Family communities.⁷

Sex Education
We believe in presenting the children in our fellowships with honest and factual age-appropriate information about sex. We do not encourage children to engage in sexual activities among themselves. We have found it best to take a communicative, but generally conservative, stance on educating our children regarding sexuality. Family children and teenagers are taught to recognize and report any inappropriate or abusive incidents to their parents and overseers.

Birth Control
We believe that every life that comes into this world is a deliberate creation of God. However, the decision to use or not to use birth control is regarded as an entirely personal matter between the individuals concerned and God. Individual members and couples decide for themselves, after prayerful consideration of our teachings, what they believe to be God's will in their lives (280).

Abortion
Our Bible-based beliefs diametrically oppose abortion. It is our belief that life begins at conception, and therefore abortion is strongly discouraged. (See Deuteronomy 27:25; Psalm 106:38; 139:13-16 for the scriptural basis of these beliefs.) Medical decisions in cases where the life of the mother is in danger because of the pregnancy are to be made by those directly involved.

Response to HIV
To protect the health of our members and children in particular, considering the close quarters of communal living, any prospective members seeking to join a Family discipleship community must be free of HIV/AIDS (182). Applicants testing positive for HIV cannot be accepted as residents of our communities. They may retain membership if they live in their own homes and can work with other Family members, but must live apart from Family Homes. Family members are active on several continents promoting AIDS Awareness programs and assisting AIDS victims.

Homosexuality
Male-with-male sexual relationships are specifically forbidden and condemned by Scripture (Romans 1:27; Leviticus 18:22; Genesis 18:20-22; 19:1-29). We have therefore ruled that any male members found engaging in any such sexual activity will be excommunicated from our fellowship (233). Scripture does not forbid female-with-female sexual affection, nor do we. However, strictly lesbian relationships are not permitted in our communities (306).

Pornography
Our publishing policy is to only print what is a natural, normal, tasteful portrayal of human sexuality that is of artistic or educational value, and that gives credit to God's beautiful design and creation. While we take no offense at classical and artistic depictions of the human body, we do not produce, promote, or in any way condone pornographic literature, photos, or videos, nor do we accept, print, or publish any photographic or graphic illustrations of sexually illegal practices or perversions (305).

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Footnotes:
¹ The policies articulated in this statement (originally published in 1993) apply to Family communities known as "Charter Homes" governed by The Family's Love Charter (referred to as The Charter) and are drawn from that document. Any previous writings, philosophic or theological speculations, or individual opinions of members or leaders contrary to this statement that could be construed as lending credence or justification to any conduct disallowed herein have been officially renounced and are not to be taken as official policy of our organization. Should any of the policies described herein not be considered legal in some countries, the Family's Charter mandates that all Family members conduct themselves according to the local laws regarding their activities.

² All Bible verses are taken from the New King James Version, unless otherwise noted.

³ These rules are codified in n The Charter, which is comprised of two main components-the "Charter of Responsibilities and Rights" and the "Fundamental Family Rules"-outlining the most important and basic principles, goals, and beliefs of our movement, and defining our method of government.

⁴ The scriptural basis of the Law of Love is Jesus' words: "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets" (Matthew 22:37-40 KJV). The apostle Paul writes, "For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself" (Galatians 5:14 KJV). He also states, "For the commandments, 'You shall not commit adultery,' 'You shall not murder,' 'You shall not steal,' 'You shall not bear false witness,' 'You shall not covet,' and if there is any other commandment, are all summed up in this saying, namely, 'You shall love your neighbor as yourself.' Love does no harm to a neighbor; therefore love is the fulfillment of the law" (Romans 13:9-10).

⁵ See also the Family Statement entitled "God's Law of Love: The Family's Foundation Principle."."

⁶ In the United States during 1990, there were 1,044,480 child victims of substantiated maltreatment, of whom 130,248 had suffered sexual abuse. Over half of these victims were under 10 years of age. Statistics from: "The United Nations Report of the Secretary-General on Domestic Violence," 20 July 1990; James Patterson & Peter Kim, The Day America Told the Truth; "Child Abuse: Statistics, Research, and Resources," Internet posting by Jim Hopper, Ph.D.; Alan Guttmacher Institute; U.S. Department of State: "Ukraine Country Report on Human Rights Practices for 1997."

⁷ Documentation available upon request.

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Work Cited

Family, The. Love Charter, The. Bangkok: World Services, 1998.

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What Is the Family International?
The Family International (formerly known as the Children of God) is a fellowship of Christian communities with members in over 100 countries. Our current membership numbers about 8,500 full-time members and 7,000 associates.

The Family has four main objectives:

1. To share with others the life-giving message of love, hope, and salvation found in God's Word, conveying the joys of knowing Jesus as a personal Savior.
2. To ensure that each of our children receives a godly upbringing in the best possible environment we can provide.
3. To produce and distribute a wide selection of devotional, inspirational, and educational materials.
4. To actively assist the needy through producing and performing inspirational, dramatic, and musical benefits; serving as volunteers in disaster relief; and seeking ways to provide comfort and material assistance for the disadvantaged.

If you have any questions or comments, we invite you to contact us at one of the following addresses:

Web site: www.thefamily.org

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Call in the USA at:
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