Responsibilities and Rights of D.O. Family Members
Responsibilities and Rights of D.O. Family Members |
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The Family is a Christian Missionary Church dedicated to preaching the Gospel of Jesus Christ to all the World. All Family members have received Jesus as their personal Savior and have been baptized with the Holy Spirit. It is our belief that all DO Family members have been called by God as disciples to serve Him in the Family. As such, each DO Family member has responsibilities to both God and the Family, and also certain rights guaranteed to them in God's Word.
1. RESPONSIBILITIES OF INDIVIDUAL MEMBERS
The Responsibilities of Individual Members outlines what DO members are responsible to do if they wish to remain DO members. DO Family members are already fulfilling these responsibilities, so defining them merely reflects the way we are presently living.
Of course, no one is perfect, and if at some time you fail in fulfilling some of these responsibilities it won't necessarily result in your losing your DO membership. However, if you regularly fail to fulfil them, or violate or contravene them, you will be in danger of losing your DO membership by being moved to TRF Supporter Status.
These responsibilities are very important, as they outline our standard of discipleship and are the criterion for remaining a part of the DO Family.
DO Family members should:
As DO members, each of us should strive to have a deep relationship with Jesus through the communion of prayer, praise and His Word. As disciples we should pray, both individually and with others, and we should strengthen our spirits by spiritually feasting upon God's Word, privately and unitedly.
We should also "resist the Devil" (James 4:7) by actively striving to minimize the ungodly and unedifying influences in our lives. These ungodly and unedifying influences could be anything that pulls us away from the Lord or pollutes our spirit, mind or heart with "junk food" of the spirit and hinders our connection with God. This would include the reading of unedifying or ungodly material, or the watching of unedifying videos, movies or TV, or listening to ungodly music.
Undoubtedly our day-to-day work and outreach will put us in positions where we might come in contact with ungodly and unedifying influences, but we should attempt to minimize them by not intentionally inflicting upon ourselves those things that we know to be ungodly or unedifying.
There are a number of differences between us and the churches, but the main one is that God gave us David, His Endtime Prophet, as our founder, Shepherd and leader. Through the years Dad trained Maria as his successor, and with his passing, the Lord has anointed her as His Prophetess and Shepherdess of the Family. Years ago, in prophecy through Dad the Lord said, "When David is taken from thee, thou shalt be known as a Prophetess, and thou shalt be heeded as the Oracles of God and thou shalt become as another one—as the Prophetess of God!" (ML #111:22.) We know by the wonderful fruit of Dad and Mama's ministry, the billions reached with the Gospel and the millions of souls saved through the Family, that they are called and chosen of God.
The Lord, through the Bible and Dad and Mama, has poured forth an immense amount of teaching, training, guidance, spiritual truths, revelations and direction. The Bible and the Letters embody our religious beliefs and doctrine. These beliefs vary in importance, but some are an integral and essential part of our faith, which as DO members we must believe and teach.
Our "Statement of Faith" articulates most of the Family's fundamental beliefs, as it includes the following subjects: The Scriptures, God, Creation, the fall of Man, Jesus Christ the Son of God, the way of salvation, the Holy Spirit, the baptism of the Holy Spirit, the gifts of the Spirit, the fruits of the Spirit, Angels, spirits, departed saints, Satan, demons, spiritual warfare, prayer, divine healing, the fellowship of believers, the Lord's Supper, the Church, the Great Commission, consecration, separation from the World, persecution for righteousness' sake, discipleship, cooperative communal living, children, the sanctity of life, civil government and religious liberty, as well as a personal belief in Bible prophecy indicating that we are living in the Endtime.
We also have other beliefs which we consider to be fundamental and essential that are not included in the "Statement of Faith," such as the Law of Love. These are, however, explained in published MLs.
Obviously not every Letter or publication from World Services contains fundamental or essential beliefs. There are nearly 3,000 Letters that have now been published on a myriad of subjects. Contained within them is a wide variety of teaching and revelations, of dreams and spiritual experiences, of advice and counsel on both spiritual and practical matters. Some of this is fundamental and essential to our belief system, some is not.
For example, salvation by grace, eternal salvation, and a belief in spiritual warfare, Angels and departed saints are all essential Family beliefs. You can't be a DO member unless you believe these truths. The same holds true with such doctrines as Creation, as God outlined it in Genesis, that Jesus is the Son of God, etc.
There are, however, times when Dad has made statements in the Letters to the effect of, "This is what I feel about this subject, but you don't have to believe it if you don't want to." In such a case, what Dad has said would be part of the totality of our beliefs, but it would not be considered an essential one. Another example of a non-essential belief would be the "Trailer Series" ("Have Trailer, Will Travel!") which Dad wrote some years ago, in which he expounded on living in trailers or caravans. Those Letters are part of our beliefs but are not considered to be fundamental or essential.
As DO members, we are expected to believe and teach the Family's fundamental and essential beliefs. As mentioned earlier, most of these are compiled in the "Statement of Faith" for your reference. This is not to say that the "Statement of Faith" supersedes the Letters; it's just that, at the present time it is the only publication that contains a comprehensive list of almost all of our fundamental beliefs.
Our other Family Statements also contain a great deal of description on all facets of our Family life and beliefs, but the "Statement of Faith" deals specifically with our basic beliefs. Of course, these fundamental beliefs are more completely expounded upon in the Letters, and this is where you should go in order to gain a more thorough understanding of them. God willing, in the future we hope to publish a complete listing of all of our fundamental Family beliefs.
In the future, when the Lord gives something new to Mama which is to become a fundamental Family belief, it will be officially stated as such and published in a GN or publication bearing a Letter number.
God's Word says that "faith cometh by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God" (Romans 10:17). In order to strengthen our faith, and to be in tune with the Lord and the directions that He is giving the Family, it is imperative that we read and study His Word, both the Bible and the Letters and other WS publications, for they contain a wealth of needed counsel, direction and spiritual feeding.
Dad succinctly explained the Law of Love in the following quote. "`Love doeth thy neighbor no harm', for `thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself': This is God's Law of Love! `Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.' `Against such love there is no law.' This is the Lord's Law of Love. Obey it and you can have total love, life and liberty in the Lord. These are God's conditions. (Romans 13:10; Matthew 22:39; Matthew 7:12; Galatians 5:22,23.)" (ML #302C:8; DB1.)
Many have the idea that the Law of Love concerns only sexual matters.—This is not so, as the Law of Love governs all of our actions and is the basis for all of our Family rules, rights and responsibilities.
This clause in the Charter is one of the most important, as it sets the tone for all that is to follow. The Charter grants a number of rights for our members in order to allow them to operate according to their faith. It also gives each individual much more authority over what happens in their Home. But the reason for giving these rights is not to create a "me first" attitude, where we put our "rights" above all other concerns. Unselfish love, the love that puts the needs of others before our own, the great love that lays down its life for others, the Love of God in our hearts, that is the heart and soul of this Charter. Without love, it is just a listing of rules, regulations and laws.
If we implement the Charter without love, the end result could be an organization with members who are looking out mainly for themselves. If it is implemented with the main ingredient being the Love of God, it will result in a stronger Family, with wise, loving and full-of-faith brothers and sisters.
The implementation of the Charter is going to be a test of our spiritual maturity. Daily we will be faced with situations in which we will have to decide if we are going to put our individual wants and desires above the needs of others. It will measure our prayerfulness, our unselfishness and our love for others.
When we find ourselves voting on matters within the Home, we must vote according to what we believe is God's Will, and what is the loving and Godly thing to do. Remember the Law of Love: "Love doeth thy neighbor no harm." With the Charter, we are each responsible to live the Law of Love. "By this shall all men know that ye are My disciples, if ye have love one to another" (John 13:35).
The Lord has called all Christians to partake in the Great Commission. "Go ye into all the World and preach the Gospel to every creature" (Mark 16:15). We have answered that call, and as such, we have a commitment to win others to Jesus by dedicating ourselves to the goal of preaching the Gospel to every creature.
The definition of evangelism is "zealous preaching and dissemination of the Gospel, such as through missionary work." We felt this was the appropriate way to express the concept of both witnessing to the unsaved and follow-up feeding, which includes teaching the Word to those who are saved. We considered wording this point, "Regularly engages in witnessing," but if you were in a situation where you had so many sheep that were already saved and you were teaching them regular classes, you might not consider that "witnessing," but it would be considered evangelism. The main point is that we must all be working to "preach the Gospel to every creature."
The "Fundamental Family Rules" is a separate section at the end of the "Charter of Responsibilities and Rights." (See pg.116.) Within it are both behavioral and procedural rules, which Family members are expected to follow. Family members who violate these rules will be disciplined according to the severity of the infractions of these rules.
There are 47 behavioral rules, which cover all major aspects of our lives, including finances, outreach, sex and affection, food and drink, get-out, driving, health and hygiene, marriage and separation, home life, scholastics, schedules and excommunication, as well as required meetings and activities.
Prior to this Charter there were over 600 "Family rules" loosely outlined in the Letters and other pubs! Although these former "Family rules" no longer constitute rules which members can lose their DO Status for breaking, they are still very good guidelines for our lives that will help us to do a better job for the Lord. Some of them your Home may decide to implement as Home Regulations.
In choosing the rules that were included in the "Fundamental Family Rules" we prayerfully chose those which we felt were the most important for the Family. After selecting them, we consulted with Family members from all walks of Family life to ensure that these rules would be practical and workable. We pray that you will find them so.
Reside in a DO Home, and appear on a Home's monthly report each month.
1. While a member is in transit to their new Home and/or making preparations to open their own Home--after exercising their Right of Mobility, or having been voted out of their former Home--their former Home may allow them to remain on their TRF for a maximum of two reporting periods after the member physically leaves the Home, providing the Home receives their stats, tithe and FAF contribution during this period.
To retain its DO Status, a Home must consist of a minimum of four voting members; that is, members 16 years of age or older. As Dad said, "You definitely need fellowship! It was our communal living which first appealed to you, our togetherness. There was strength in unity" (ML #848-2:96).
The specific details of this are covered later in the Charter in the section Definition of a DO Home (pg.42). As also explained in that section, the maximum Home size is 35 total members (adults plus children), unless special permission is granted. This is a move to encourage smaller, more intimate and easier-to-manage Homes.
Our Family believes in Acts 2:44 and 45, which says, "And all that believed were together, and had all things common; and sold their possessions and goods, and parted them to all men, as every man had need." This is a key verse in our Family way of life, as it governs the use and ownership of our material possessions. The goal of these verses and of their companion verses, Acts 4:34-35, is that everyone has what he or she needs, and that those who have more than they need should lovingly share it with those who lack.
As disciples and DO members, we share our material belongings with one another so that we will all have the things that we need and that no one will be in want. In some cases the word "share" would mean to "give"; in other cases it would mean to "make available for others to use."
The area of material possessions can be a real test of our love, unselfishness and faithfulness. Are we loving enough to supply the needs of others by the giving of those things we have to fill their need? Are we unselfish enough to give even though it hurts, or conversely to refuse to receive an item because we know the giver needs it more than ourselves? Are we faithful stewards of the things we use?
Whatever material possessions you or the Home have, they ultimately belong to the Lord and it is your responsibility to take good care of them, to be a faithful steward of them. When you have need of something and someone shares it with you, whether by allowing you to use it, or by giving it to you, it is your responsibility to take good care of it.
At times, questions will arise concerning who some item actually belongs to. This will most often occur when someone is moving from a Home and wishes to take an item with them. In such cases the Home should decide the matter by a simple majority vote. Generally, with major items, the Home should consider what is best for the overall work. (For further counsel, see Financial Rules in the "Fundamental Family Rules" section, pg.145.)
We are expected to be good stewards over not only the Family's materials but also of those things that are entrusted to our care by outsiders, such as rented housing, properties and other materials belonging to non-Family members.
God's Word instructs us, "Bear ye one another's burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ" (Galatians 6:2). This is another Law of Love clause. As Jesus laid down His life for us, so we should lay down our lives daily for the brethren. As disciples, we should manifest our love one for another by doing all we can to make sure that we are aware of the physical, spiritual and emotional needs of those around us, and we should do whatever we can to help care for them in their need. Since so much within the Home will be decided by the Home's voting members, it will become even more important that we all are mindful of the burdens, hardships, battles and needs of others in the Home, and that we are willing to put their needs and the good of the Home before our own wants and desires.
When prayerfully deciding how to vote on a matter within the Home, you will need to take into consideration everyone in the Home. You should ask yourself how the new idea is going to affect others—the children, the parents, the single moms and dads.
Voting members have a great deal of authority in their Home through their right to vote. Throughout the Charter you'll find that there are many issues which the Home is required to democratically vote on in order to decide their course of action. Because each voting member has the right to participate in deciding these matters, they are responsible for the results of their vote. So when a Home is doing poorly, either spiritually, physically or economically, the blame will fall on the voting members of the Home, instead of solely on the Home Teamwork, because the policies of the Home are determined by the voting members and not only the Home Teamwork.
Our 16 and 17-year-olds are voting members of the Home and thus they too are equally responsible for the decisions of the Home and the outcome of those decisions. Only in the area of financial decisions is there a difference in the voting rights. Those 16 and 17 will not have a vote on the financial matters of the Home, but neither will they be responsible for the Home's debts and liabilities. This is more thoroughly explained later in the Charter. (See pg.15.)
Even though our members under the age of 16 and new disciples are not voting members, you are encouraged to seek their opinions and participation in Home matters that concern them. Whenever practical, our junior teens should be permitted to attend Home Council Meetings covering matters pertaining to them. However, until new disciples have been in the Family for six months, they should not be invited to Home Council Meetings.
It is very important for everyone to fully understand that the Home in which they live belongs to all who live in it, and all voting members are expected to participate in its decision-making process. Your Home Teamwork is only a fraction of the membership of your Home, and as such, your Home does not belong to them; nor does your Home belong to the Area or Continental Office; it's yours. As such, it is up to you to help govern your Home and make the decisions that affect it.
As Dad once admonished the Family's leadership, "I don't see how we can have a bossy, dictatorial, tough kind of attitude over other Homes and their affairs, when you're supposed to be independent and indigenous, a fellowship of the Spirit, merely melted together in love and not just frozen together in formality!
"We must get the idea through our thick skulls that each Home is [to be] totally supporting and governing itself locally and owes us nothing except the loyalty of love and the same Spirit, and are bound together only by these and a common doctrine, vision, message and method, history and the Lord's leadership.
"Not one of them has to do what we say. They're like grown, married children on their own, who should listen to fatherly counsel and perhaps heed it if they are wise—but we can't force them to!
"However, if we have trained them up in the way they should go, now that they are old, they will not depart therefrom! Neither will they want to depart from the fellowship of the Family nor disgrace its name! Nor will their Father's advice and counsel go unheeded! Neither will they want to cease communicating with the rest of the Family!—And they will help one another when needed!—And they will value the aids we send them, the lessons, Letters, literature, etc., and follow their instructions or advice because they know we love them and are only trying to help them. But we cannot force them to! They will cooperate because it's to their advantage and they know that in unity there is greater strength and wisdom, and they enjoy the fellowship and mutual help. Voluntary, not forced!" (ML #156C:8,9,10,11; DB5.)
Because you personally have the ability to participate, through voting, in virtually all decisions governing all aspects of your Home, you—collectively with all other voting members of the Home—bear responsibility for the outcome of those decisions. If the Home collectively agrees to pursue some course of action and it later goes awry, then it is the Home's fault, and each voting member of the Home is to blame. If things go so bad that the Home has to be disciplined, then all of the Home members will be disciplined, not just the Teamwork. If the Home is mismanaged or becomes spiritually dead, then every person age 16 and over is responsible, because they had a say in the decisions and resultant problems.
You have the right to participate in the governing of your Home, but you also bear the responsibility for those decisions. It's because of this responsibility that you should feel obligated to participate in the decision-making process in the Home. Each of you needs to be involved, to pray about the matters being brought up and cast your vote, and not just let others make the decisions, because you are going to be held responsible. If you just rock along and don't pay attention to or pray about the matter being voted on, you may find your Home reaping the results of unprayerful or unwise decisions.
Since you will have an equal vote with all other members of your Home, and you will be participating in the governing of the Home through your vote, you are expected to abide by all joint decisions made by the voting members of the Home. Once your Home has voted on a matter, then you must comply with the decision made, even if you voted against it, because the majority of the voting members agreed to it.
If you strongly disagree with the other voting members of your Home on a matter, you are free to move out of the Home in accordance with the terms of the Right of Mobility. Remember, though, that any Home you live in will probably not always vote on matters to your satisfaction, so you shouldn't decide to move out of your Home every time something doesn't go your way. Moving to another Home may be a fairly easy matter, as you will see in the Right of Mobility section of the Charter (pg.18); but as long as you are in a particular Home, you must live in accordance with the decisions made in that Home.
The voting members determine their Home's basic nature, goals and direction by a two-thirds majority. If, for example, you collectively decide that your Home is going to major on a "Consider the Poor" ministry, such as ministering to juvenile delinquents, then all of you are expected to contribute your all—your gifts, talents, energy, etc.—to achieve that goal, within your capabilities and health. If you don't agree with the goals of the Home, and therefore don't want to participate in reaching that goal, you will be expected to move elsewhere.
The voting members of a Home elect the Home Teamwork with the understanding that the Teamwork is commissioned to manage and spiritually shepherd the Home within the authorized boundaries of this Charter. This includes carrying out the matters which the majority of the Home agrees to. Home members are therefore expected to perform the duties that are assigned to them by the Home Officers they have elected.
The voting members of the Home determine the way the Home operates, what the Home's ministries will be, etc., and the members of the Home are expected to comply with those decisions and to support them.
For example, if the majority of the Home votes to send out witnessing teams five times a week, and you had only wanted teams to go out three times, you should still support the decision voted on by the Home and cooperate in trying to get witnessing teams out five times per week.
If for some reason you can't agree to the decision and you consider it to be a major enough matter that you don't feel that you can cooperate with it or support it, then you should voluntarily decide to move to another Home or pioneer your own Home. Of course there will be numerous times when the Home does not vote the way you do, but in most cases those will be on minor issues, and we expect that you probably won't feel that you need to leave the Home.
You will note the clause, "or unable to cooperate for any other reason." There may be other reasons you are not able to cooperate with or support a decision. For example, perhaps the Home members want to start a band and devote most of their time to ministering to young teens, and you are not a musician and you are more gifted in witnessing to older people. Another example would be if you were confined to a wheelchair and your Home were offered a free apartment in an ideal witnessing area, but it had no elevator; in which case you would not feel it was practical for you to remain a part of that Home, but rather than ask the Home not to move, you might feel that the wise and loving thing to do would be to find a more suitable Home. If for any reason, no matter what it is, you don't feel that you can go along with the decisions of the Home, then you should try to find a Home that is more suited to your liking, in accordance with the Right of Mobility.
Each of us should be a good example of a Christian and of a Family member, for our sample speaks much louder than our sermon. As much as possible, our actions should lift up Jesus, and none of them should defame or blemish either the Lord or the Family.
In different areas of the World, this could mean refraining from different things. Wherever we live, we must take into account the traditions and culture of the community or country and try not to do things that would offend individuals of that culture. This is part of trying to comply with the Biblical counsel to "become all things to all men" (1Corinthians 9:22).
There is, of course, a great deal of counsel in the Letters regarding our sample and actions which applies no matter where we live.
DO members are expected to work on their personal weaknesses and NWOs, as if these get out of hand, they could eventually result in an individual causing problems for themselves and/or the Home, which, if long-lasting or serious enough, could eventually warrant moving them to TRF Supporter Status.
However, if one's personal weaknesses are such that they do not cause spiritual or physical disruption of the Home, nor spiritual, physical or emotional harm to themselves or others, it is not mandatory that they overcome them to retain their DO membership; though they are expected to try to overcome them, and they may receive some counsel on the matter from their Home Teamwork.
For example, if you have a problem with pride, and it's your besetting sin, but you are aware of it and are continually trying to keep it in check, and it's not causing major problems in the Home or even to yourself, then you aren't in danger of losing your DO Status. If, however, because of your pride, you are causing problems in the Home, the Teamwork may talk with you about it and offer some advice to help you overcome it. If you refuse their advice, or you don't seriously attempt to overcome it, you could end up eventually losing your place in the DO Family.
The Bible says, "Know ye not that your body is the temple of the Holy Ghost which is in you, which ye have of God, and ye are not your own? For ye are bought with a price: therefore glorify God in your body, and in your spirit, which are God's. Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are" (1Corinthians 6:19-20; 3:16-17).
As Dad has clearly explained in numerous Letters, the Lord made man to need physical activity and fresh air in order to remain healthy. Maybe what the Lord meant when He said that he that defiles the temple of God, our body, "him shall God destroy," is that they will be destroyed with illness as a result of their negligence.
As witnessing Christians, our appearance is part of our testimony, so we must endeavor (which means to make an earnest attempt) to stay healthy and physically fit. (The Get-Out Rules are clearly explained in the "Fundamental Family Rules," pg.127.) We must also keep a clean and presentable appearance which is compatible with the country and culture in which we live.
As the Charter and the "Fundamental Family Rules" define our responsibilities, our rights, and the rules that we must follow to be DO members, obviously each of us should have a basic working knowledge of these documents. This doesn't mean that you need to become an expert on the intricacies of the Charter, but neither will you be able to claim ignorance of the law if you fail to obey it. We have endeavored to compile and clearly explain in this book all of your responsibilities and rights, as well as the rules, and having done so, it is now your responsibility to familiarize yourself with them.
This ends the section outlining the "Responsibilities of Individual Members." Those who fulfil these responsibilities consequently have certain rights as DO members.
Actually, when reading your rights, it would be wise to remind yourself that you have these rights only if you are fulfilling your responsibilities. It's a two-way street; you must act as a DO member in order to have the rights of a DO member.
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2. BASIC RIGHTS OF INDIVIDUAL MEMBERS
DO Family members have the right to:
The term "individual choice" is used to stress that each and every DO member of voting age has just that—the right to choose the things he or she wants to do. Of course, if you choose to do things that are not in agreement with what the Family is all about, then you may be in jeopardy of losing your membership, or if you wish, you can choose to leave the Family.
The definition of self-determination is: "Determination of one's own fate or course of action without compulsion." This is included to ensure you the right to make personal choices without anyone compelling you to do something you don't want to do. The definition of compel is: "To force, drive, or constrain; to necessitate or pressure by force; to exert a strong, irresistible force on." As Dad said, "We have to choose for ourselves, find His Will for ourselves, seek Him diligently to know His Will, and to know what is best for us and others through our knowledge of His Word and personal experience. This is why He put us here, this is what we're here to learn, and the major part of our training: How to make the right decisions through our personal contact with Him, our knowledge of His Word and His Will, and our love for Him and others" (ML #238:9).
Throughout the Letters, Dad and Mama have said that each individual should determine his own course of action without anyone pressuring, forcing, or exerting strong, irresistible force on him to do something he doesn't want to do. We trust that you love the Lord enough and are spiritually mature enough to make the right decisions through prayer, His Word and Godly counsel. The only One Who should compel or constrain us to do anything is Jesus. "For the Love of Christ constraineth us" (2Corinthians 5:14). His Word and your love for Him are what should motivate you to do the right things, not because someone is making you do them, but because you choose to out of love. If you must be forced to obey and follow the Lord rather than obey Him because you love Him, then you're not a very strong disciple.
This doesn't mean that you should now "do your own thing" and act however you want without any concern for others or the Family. If you wish to remain a DO member, you must operate within the boundaries of the "Charter of Responsibilities and Rights" and the "Fundamental Family Rules." And as long as you do, you are free to follow the Lord as you feel led, without anyone forcing you to do anything you don't feel is God's Will for you.
You have the right to exercise your personal initiative and faith and to be in a Home where you are best able to do so. If not, you have the right to try to change the situation through your voting power, or move to a different Home, or pioneer your own Home with those who are like-minded; or if you feel you have no place in the Family, you are free to leave if you choose.
You have the right to help decide the direction, the goals and the basic nature of your Home, and the activities which your Home undertakes to meet those goals. You have the right to pray, discuss with others, and debate any issues in your Home Council Meetings before voting on a course of action.
Under the Election Rules, which are found in the "Fundamental Family Rules" (pg.140), unless specified otherwise, when a vote is taken on any matter, the majority rules. So if over 50% of the Home's voting members agree with something, then it is passed. This means that if there is a tie vote then the measure is not passed. There are some matters that require two-thirds of the voting members' agreement before passage, including all financial matters, certain personnel changes, and disciplinary matters.
One portion of this clause states, "providing they are consistent with the goals of the Continental Area in which they reside." Later it will be explained about Continental Area goals and how these are determined. (See pg.46, and point D. of the Election Rules.) In brief, Homes will have the opportunity to vote on individual Continental Area goals, but once such goals are agreed upon and enacted, then the Homes in the Area must abide by them. Obviously, another very important stipulation of Home decisions is that they must also "be consistent with the goals of the overall Family."
We believe that divine healing is a privilege available to all who believe in Jesus. The decision to avail yourself of that privilege is a personal matter between you and God. Generally it is recommended to trust the Lord for your healing, but we understand that the Lord works in each of our lives in different ways, and in some cases He may want someone to get the help of a doctor. When it comes to healing, the decision whether to trust God completely for healing or to seek medical help is up to you. "According to your faith be it unto you" (Matthew 9:29). Dad said, "God wants you to make your own choice by faith according to your own faith—not mine, not ours, not somebody else's, but yours!" (ML #M:45.)
The first step when someone is sick would be to seek prayer from the Home. As the Bible says, "Is any sick among you? Let him call for the elders of the church and let them pray over him" (James 5:14).
If the illness is such that you might wish to seek medical attention, it is advisable to pray with and seek counsel from the Home Teamwork. In more serious cases where grave medical decisions must be made, we suggest that the Home pray and hear from the Lord in prophecy for the person. Receiving such prophecies can provide wonderful guidance and great comfort and assurance for the sick one. Sometimes prophecies can be rather mysterious, but because they are words given by the One Who knows our innermost heart and needs, specifically for the one with sickness, the interpretation of the prophecies and final course of action must be determined by the sick individual. Because healing is a personal matter, the sick one must make the final medical decisions based on his or her personal faith. The other members of the Home should continue to encourage and help the sick member no matter what decision they make, even if the others feel it's the wrong one.
If you are a parent with children in the Family, the medical decisions regarding your under-age children are your responsibility to make and they should be made in your child's best interests.
There are some legal factors to consider when making medical decisions for your children. This includes the ages when children can make their own medical decisions. As far as the Family is concerned, those who have reached the age of 16 are eligible to make their own medical decisions, but in some countries this may not be legal, so that must be taken into consideration.
Of course in an emergency, if someone is unconscious or otherwise incapacitated, then the Home Teamwork is responsible to pray and make whatever medical decisions are necessary to help the individual.
Every Home member has the right to be able to communicate with any or all leadership in their Area above their Home Teamwork, and directly with Mama or WS, if they so desire. An address for all of these Shepherds must be readily available to them. If someone chooses to write to higher leadership, no one should try to stop or hinder them, or demand to read the letter before it is sent. You have an open line of communication to leadership, so if you feel you need to write for any reason, you are free to do so. Most Areas provide a local address for you to write, but if not, or if you would prefer, you can write Mama or WS at: World Services, Postfach 241, 8021 Zurich, Switzerland.
If you are fulfilling the Responsibilities of Individual Members, and are keeping the "Fundamental Family Rules," you cannot be moved to TRF Supporter Status, nor be excommunicated, as you have the right to remain in the DO Family.
This publication (which will be coming later) clearly defines what TRF Supporter Status is, and what one has to do to qualify for and to remain a TRF Supporter. Any DO member who wishes to move to TRF Supporter Status has the right to do so as long as they abide by the TRF Supporter stipulations.
Anyone of legal age is free to leave the Family at any time they wish. No one is forced to remain. In fact, if someone wants to go, then we want and encourage them to do so. We are not in the business of trying to coerce anyone to remain in the Family who desires otherwise; on the contrary, we are a Gideon's Band, and only those who want to be here should be.
If one or more of your children decide that they no longer wish to be in the Family, then you should try to help them get relocated with relatives if possible. If they are older, you may want to assist them in getting set up in their new situation. Remember, they are still yours and God's children, even though they may be wayward, so you should show them love, concern and care. (See ML #2942, "When Teens Leave the Family," GN 608.)
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3. RIGHTS OF THE INDIVIDUAL: WITHIN THE HOME
Voting members have the right to:
You have the right to elect your Home Teamwork. Under the Election Rules section of the "Fundamental Family Rules" you'll find the explanation of what steps must be taken to elect the Home Teamwork. (pg.140.)
In the past, Home Teamwork elections were held every three months. Many have commented that it takes almost that much time for a Teamwork to settle into the job and to work well together. So in order to make things more workable, Home elections will now be held every six months.
Three months after each election there will be a Vote of Confirmation, at which time each Home will vote to confirm or not confirm their present Teamwork for the second half of the six-month term of office. This is explained more fully in the Election Rules section of the "Fundamental Family Rules."
As financial matters are a very important part of the running of the Home, and can in many ways make or break a Home, it is imperative that all voting members of the Home, except those ages 16 and 17, be involved in the financial decisions. In order to make sound decisions, the voting members must know the complete state of the finances, so it is up to the Teamwork to keep them informed of such.
As you read through the Charter, you will notice that there are a number of financial matters that need to be decided upon through voting, and all financial votes are determined by a two-thirds majority instead of just a simple majority of 51%.
Knowledge of the exact locations of Home funds and bank accounts is limited only to the Home Teamwork and others they feel may need to know. It is the Home Teamwork's responsibility to keep the Home's finances safe and secure. But the details of the exact amounts of assets, liabilities, income, expenses and debts are to be made known to all voting members. (Although there will be a greater knowledge of Home finances within the Home, Home members should take care not to discuss such financial matters with outsiders, or where the Home's children can overhear.)
Although 16 and 17-year-olds do not have a vote on financial matters, they still retain the right to know the state of the Home's finances. Likewise, they should still engage in the discussions regarding finances, and their views should be heard and considered.
Throughout the Charter, there is quite a bit said about finances, and especially about debts. Unfortunately, sometimes a Home has debts, and when it does, this can cause problems which must be solved. We have attempted to give guidelines by which to solve those problems; in doing so, it has meant having to write a great deal on the subject. The goal, though, is to keep your Home out of debt, and if you do, then many of the portions of the Charter concerning Home debts will not affect you.
a) 16 and 17-year-old members are exempt from all financial decisions and obligations.
All financial decisions and obligations belong to the Home as a whole, and the voting members are collectively responsible to pay these obligations. The financial stability of the Home will be determined by how much the Lord blesses the Home, most likely based on their prayers and obedience, and how wise they are in how they use the funds the Lord gives them. Homes which are praying for finances and are obedient to the Lord's leading will most likely do well. As Mama said, "Everyone can work in some way to help support the Home.... Everyone can pray and search the Word for direction!" (ML #2929:43.) But how prayerful and obedient the Home is will be determined by the decisions of its voting members. If your Home has financial difficulties, there will be no one to blame but yourselves, because the majority of the Home members will have made all the decisions, and unitedly you must all bear the responsibility of those decisions.
Our Family policy has always been against being in debt. Dad has written a number of Letters about paying your creditors, those whom you owe money for rent, utilities or whatever. He has always advocated "cash and carry"—that you pay for what you buy, and if you don't have the money for it you don't buy it. Dad said, "If there's anything you need to learn, it's how to live on a businesslike basis.—Common sense, no credit, cash and carry.... Live within your income day by day, or week by week or month by month. Don't spend money you haven't got" (ML #701:23,67).
Generally our Homes have adhered to this practice and have paid their bills on time. Unfortunately, there have been times when Homes have gotten into debt. Usually these same Homes do not do so well spiritually or organizationally either, and often end up closing, and their members move on to other Homes. However, the last ones remaining in the Home have often been stuck with the unpaid bills. "Brethren, these things ought not so to be." So although it is against our general policy, debts do sometimes occur, and thus we must deal with the problem in this Charter.
In order to enforce our policy of no debts, there have been some changes made on the TRF report form that clearly reflect whether your Home is in debt. If your Home reports being in debt for two consecutive months, the Home will automatically be put on Probationary Notice, which means your WS mailings will be stopped. So as you can see, not paying your bills on time, thus being in debt, will have serious consequences. Probationary Notice will be explained more fully in the Procedures for Placing a Home on Probationary Notice. (pg.103.)
For the purpose of this document, we will differentiate between being in debt and having a liability. A debt is when you have a bill to pay and the payment is overdue. For example, if your phone bill is due on a certain date, and you don't pay it by that date, then it becomes a debt, because it is the non-payment of a bill. If your rent is due on the first of the month, but you find that when the day comes to pay your rent you don't have the money, then you are in debt, because you have an unpaid bill that is past due.
A liability is when you owe a certain amount of money that you promise to pay back over time, paying a certain amount at a given time each month. For example, perhaps your Home took out a Home Loan of $1,000 with the agreement to repay it at $100 per month for ten months. Although you now owe $1,000, it is considered a liability, not a debt. You have agreed to pay your "bill" at the rate of $100 each month. However, if you do not pay your $100 bill one month, then the payment of that "bill" would be late, and that $100 would become a debt. The remainder of the $1,000 to be repaid would still only be a liability.
Another example of a liability would be in a rare case when a Home receives outreach tools from their PPC on credit, and promises to pay for these tools at a specific rate per month. As long as they are faithfully paying the agreed amount each month, then the total amount they owe to the PPC is a liability. Liabilities only become debts when they are not paid on time, and are then the non-payment or late payment of bills.
If your Home has liabilities, you won't be put on Probationary Notice, providing you are staying current on your payments of the agreed-upon amounts.
While you remain part of the Home, you—collectively with everyone else—are responsible for the debts and liabilities. This doesn't mean that each person in the Home has to bring in a certain amount of money to pay the debts or liabilities, as in some Homes there will be those whose main ministry is outreach, while others care for the children, and so forth. Those on outreach would generally be the ones to bring in the finances, while those in childcare make it possible for the outreach teams to go out by caring for the children.
Hopefully Homes will stay out of debt; however, if yours doesn't, and you wish to leave your Home that has run up debts, then you are responsible to pay your portion of the debt and liabilities before you leave, 16 and 17-year-olds excluded. Your Home came to a united agreement on its financial decisions, and thus you are responsible for a portion of these debts and liabilities. If the result of those decisions is that your Home goes into debt, you must share in the blame.
If you choose to leave a Home, your portion of the Home debts and liabilities will have to be determined. The formula for this is: One portion equals the sum of debts and liabilities divided by the number of voting members. So if you have 10 voting members (who have reached the age of 18) and your Home is $1,000 in debt, then according to the formula your portion is $100. (A debt or liability of $1,000 divided by 10 voting members over the age of 18 equals $100.) So before you can leave the Home, you need to contribute $100 to the Home to cover your portion, unless for some reason the Home votes to free you from this payment.
Remember, this is by no means a license to run up debts. For the record, we would like to reiterate that it is not Family policy to have debts; but if your Home does get in debt, then such debts must be paid off.
It is because of this clause that we have set the voting age limit for financial matters at 18. Originally we were going to allow the 16 and 17-year-olds to vote on and be responsible for the financial issues, including the Home's debts and liabilities. If we had, this would have meant that you 16 and 17-year-olds would be responsible to pay your portion of the Home's debts and liabilities before you could join another Home.
So after much prayer and counsel, we felt that while you could participate in financial discussions in your Home Council Meetings and give your opinions, it would be best for you if you were not allowed to vote on financial matters and thus not be responsible for the outcome of the decisions. This way you could learn about how the Home deals with its financial concerns so that you will have a full understanding of it by the time you are responsible for them when you reach 18.
As this Charter will be going into effect on April 1, 1995, each Home should plan to get together before March 1 to discuss their present financial standing. At this point any and all existing debts and liabilities (Home Loans, PPC credits, etc.) should be clearly outlined for all voting Home members so they will know what they as a Home are now collectively responsible for.
All voting members who have reached the age of 18 have the right to vote on all financial matters pertaining to your Home. This will be covered in greater detail later.
While it may be most appropriate to suggest topics for Home Council Meetings prior to the meeting, allowing for a predetermined agenda to be followed in the meeting, you are free to bring up any matter that you want to in the appropriate Home Council. However, since the meeting will probably be following a predetermined agenda, it may be inappropriate to stop everything and discuss and vote on that matter right then. The person chairing the Home Council Meeting will make that decision. In any case, the topic needs to be discussed and voted on within 15 days.
After agreement is reached in a Home Council Meeting, the decisions of the voting members are to be implemented. So even if the Home Teamwork feels the Home should do one thing, but the voting members vote to do something else, then the decision of the voting members is what should be carried out.
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4. RIGHT OF MOBILITY
The Right of Mobility is one of the most important rights granted under the Charter. Knowing that you have the right to move from one Home to another Home, and that you can easily do so without a lot of red tape, will make it possible for you to more easily remove yourself from a situation in which you are not happy. If you don't like the way the Home is run, and you can't change it through voting or Home Council Meetings, you are free to move without the need of having to wait for the Area or Continental Office to work it out for you. Except in the case of Sensitive Countries, clearance is automatically granted if the member does not receive a response to his clearance request from the Continental Office within the prescribed 30-day waiting period. Within 14 days after receipt of a clearance request, the receiving Continental Office must respond to the applicant with a form message receipt, acknowledging that their clearance request was received and including the date that the application arrived, which date then begins the applicant's 30-day processing period.
Giving voting members the Right of Mobility will hopefully help motivate those who are shepherding Homes to do all they can to have an inspiring Home so that those in the Home will want to remain, rather than Home members becoming discontent and dissatisfied and leaving. The reason for the Right of Mobility is not to encourage you to keep moving from Home to Home every time something comes up that you don't like—and in fact, we'd like to encourage teams who have fruitful ministries to stick together rather than constantly changing personnel—but we do want to give you the opportunity to move should you feel it's necessary after prayerful consideration. If you are truly unhappy or discontent in your Home, and/or the Lord wants you to move on to another situation, you are free to do so.
The Right of Mobility covers moving out of a Home. However, going out on road trips from your Home, visiting other Homes, personnel temporarily helping another Home, or visiting relatives, etc., are not matters covered by the section Right of Mobility. Such matters within and between Homes should be counseled about and decided upon directly by the Home(s) involved.
All voting members have the "right" to move out of their Home. However, this does not mean that those under the age of 16, especially those 14 and 15, must always live in the same Home as their parents. It's just that they don't have the "right" to move upon demand. Teens under the age of 18 are permitted to reside away from their parents providing they wish to do so, and at least one of their parents is in agreement, and the receiving Home agrees to accept them. In many countries there are laws concerning underage children living away from their parents. You should familiarize yourself with your local laws and take them into consideration.
Voting members have the right to:
In brief, the Right of Mobility means that you can move out of your Home as long as you meet the following five stipulations:
1. You are at least 18 years of age and give 30 days notice.
2. You properly turn over your ministries and duties.
3. Your portion of the Home's debts and liabilities is paid.
4. Your Home is not on Probationary Notice.
5. You as an individual are not on Probationary Status in your Home.
Each of the stipulations has some sub-sections under it, and all are covered in greater detail below.
Those over 18 can move out of a Home by giving 30 days notice in writing to the Home Teamwork of their intention to move and their planned destination. (The stipulations for those voting members who are 16 and 17 are explained below.)
Those wishing to move must also inform both the Area and Continental Offices. Once they give their notice, they lose the right to vote on Home matters, and are freed of any responsibility for new financial obligations or debts the Home incurs.
The decision to move out of your Home should not be made on a whim. It should be a careful and prayerful decision, taking into consideration the seven ways to know the Will of God. (See "How Can I Know What God's Will Is?" Treasures, pg.63.) You should be convinced that it's the Lord's Will for you to do so, and it should be done "decently and in order" (1Corinthians 14:40).
As Dad cautioned, "May we never make a move without hearing from God. Those who succeed are those who wait upon His Word, and those that fail are those who go ahead without it!" (DM 1:141.)
There are a number of factors to consider when contemplating moving out of your Home. One of the main factors is that each of us has a responsibility to the Home in which we live, and should take into account what effect our departure will have on the Home and its ministries. If a number of Home members decide to leave in 30 days, it may mean that those remaining behind will not be able to sustain the ministries of the Home, and consequently those fruitful ministries will suffer or be lost, and this may result in many people losing the opportunity to hear the Gospel.
The Right of Mobility is meant to make it possible for those who definitely feel the Lord wants them to change Homes to do so easily. It is not a general call for all of us to hit the road to become "roving rebel bands!"—Nor is it being given to promote individuals abandoning their Homes and ministries.
Our prayer, intent and desire is that all such moves will be prayerful and responsible decisions; that when the Lord leads you to move, you will "squeeze, not jerk"; and that you will take into account the needs of your Home before doing so. For example, it might be appropriate to inform your Home that you feel called to another Area, but that you are willing to stay temporarily to fulfil your commitments to the Home and give them time to try and find a replacement before you go.
When you move into a new Home, you should do so with the attitude that you are investing yourself in the work. As with any investment, it takes time for it to yield a dividend or to bear fruit; thus you should be prepared to remain in your new Home long enough to bear that fruit. If you have sought the Lord about your move and He has led you to that Home, then you should resolve that the Lord wants you to invest in that Home and its ministries. You should commit yourself to working in that Home and remaining in it through thick and thin, through the good times and the bad. And if things don't go as well as you hoped they would, your first impulse shouldn't be to give your 30-day notice and leave. You should first do all you can to change the situation, through prayer, discussion and example, and keep plugging away, investing in the work the Lord has called you to. As Dad said years ago in "Shtick," "You'd better stick it out until you know God wants you to leave a job and you know He's finished with you there and He's got something else He wants you to do" (ML #703:47).
a) The 30-day departure period can be shortened by a two-thirds majority vote of the Home.
You must remain a member of your present Home until the 30 days is expired unless the Home votes to waive or shorten the period. Besides allowing you time to work out your transfer to a new Home, including taking care of fundraising and so forth, the 30 days is to allow the Home time to attempt to find a replacement for you. This is especially important if you fill a vital role within the Home, or if your leaving will reduce the number of voting members to below the minimum Home size of four voting members.
In the case of the YA couple going to Brazil, mentioned earlier, if they had gathered all of their fare and received their clearance, and if the Home had already found a replacement and there was no other reason for them to remain in the Home, the Home could vote to waive the 30 days so they could leave right away.
b) Members 16 and 17 years of age must give 30 days notice in writing, stating their planned destination to the Home's Officers, and send a copy to, or otherwise notify, their Area Office. Such teens must also inform and receive written permission from at least one parent or guardian. From that point they become non-voting members, and have no vote in Home matters.
If a 16 or 17-year-old (Senior teen) wants to move out of their Home, they must give a 30-day notice to their Home Teamwork, and send the Area and Continental Office a copy. They must also inform and get the agreement and written permission of at least one of their parents or their guardians before they can make such a move. Since many of the parents of our Senior teens are not living with them, approval from only one parent is needed.
Throughout the Charter we are trying as much as possible to give our 16 and 17-year-old members the same rights as all other voting members, except on financial matters as explained earlier. They carry a big load in the Home, and their ideas and suggestions carry weight equal to that of all other voting members. They know the Lord, and can be just as prayerful as other voting members. Although younger and less mature, if they don't get involved in the decision-making process of the Home while Senior teens, it will take them much longer to grow into responsible adults.
We are expecting you Senior teens to take your responsibilities seriously, and to understand that they are being given to you because Dad and Mama have always felt that you play an important role in the Family. It will now be up to you to show that you can prayerfully and maturely participate in the governing of your Home.
Although we have tried to give you all of the same rights as the other voting members, there are a few that we have held back or modified slightly, mainly for legal reasons. You need one of your parents' written permission to move Homes for legal reasons. In many countries those under 18 are still their parents' legal responsibility, so we feel it is necessary for you to have written (and perhaps even notarized) permission to be living away from them. In order to protect the overall Family, it is necessary to make this stipulation before you can exercise your Right of Mobility.
The spirit of the Right of Mobility is to allow 16 and 17-year-olds the full right to move Homes if they feel it is the Lord's Will. However, because in some countries they are still considered underage, they must have permission from their parents. The decision to grant them permission is yours, parents, but we hope you will decide according to the intent of this clause in the Charter. Of course, there may be times when you feel your 16 or 17-year-old may need to remain in their present Home, especially if they have problems that require shepherding by those in the Home; in which case you might not want to grant them permission to move. Generally, though, we would hope that you would grant them permission to move if they wish.
It is up to you parents to decide what type of permission you wish to give to your Senior teens. You may want to give permission each time they want to move, or you may want to give a general overall permission, or an overall permission with some stipulations. The following are a few of the possibilities:
1. Allow them to move anywhere within their present country or language area, but ask for further permission if they wish to change countries.
2. Allow them to move anywhere within their Continental Area, but ask for further permission if they wish to change CRO Areas.
3. Allow them to move, subject to their Home's or Area Office's approval.
4. Allow them to move wherever and whenever they choose.
There are many possibilities, but whatever you choose, you should make it very clear and specific in your letter of permission. (See Parental Permission Form in Appendix B.)
16 and 17-year-olds should be sure to get parental permission before giving 30 days notice to the Home.
(1) If the parents of a 16 or 17-year-old teen do not live within the same Continental Area as their teen, they may authorize the teen's Continental Office to give permission for the movement of their teen within its Continental Area.
Our Senior teens sometimes don't live on the same continent as their parents. Therefore, since the parents may not know the full situation about their older teens, or for some other reason, they may be hesitant to give their Senior teen standing permission to move whenever he wishes. In such a case the parents can authorize the Continental Office to approve their teen's movements from Home to Home. The parents should be sure that their 16 or 17-year-old has a letter of parental permission to travel, which will need to be notarized if required by law.
Once you've given your 30-day notice, and have relinquished your right to vote in Home matters, including financial matters, you are freed from all responsibility on decisions made by the Home (except Home Regulations).
a) If for some reason the member remains in the Home over one week past his 30-day notice, he once again regains his voting rights and is responsible for any new debts or liabilities incurred by the Home, unless the Home, by a two-thirds majority, agrees to extend the departure date.
Once the 30-day period is over, you are expected to leave the Home within seven days. There will be times when your plans don't work out the way you expect, and you may find you have given your 30-day notice prematurely and thus you are not able to leave within seven days after the 30-day period ends, or 37 days after originally having given your Home written notice. Perhaps the Home you were planning on moving to suddenly closed, or all of your travel funds didn't come through. If you've come to the end of your 37 days and you can't leave for one reason or another, then you once again become a voting member of your present Home, and are therefore responsible for the decisions of the Home, including any new debts or liabilities that are incurred from that time onward.
The Home can vote to extend the 37 days, if they so wish. If, for example, the funds your relatives promised for your fare haven't arrived yet, the Home may decide to extend your stay with them without making you accountable for the decisions of the Home or for any debt or liability they incur. Or the Home may want to work out a plan whereby some of the income you bring in goes to cover your portion of Home expenses during the extra time that you are there, or some other agreeable solution.
On the other hand, if you give your 30-day notice, and at the end of 37 days you are basically no further prepared for a move than you were at the beginning of this period, the Home may decide not to extend the period, and if you wish to stay in the Home you must resume the responsibilities of a voting member. In such a case, if you remain longer than 37 days, and the Home does not agree to extend your period, you regain your voting rights, and once again are responsible for the decisions of the Home, including its financial decisions. You are also responsible for any debts or liabilities that arise from that time onward.
b) The member is free to depart when his 30-day notice expires and his portion of the Home's debts and liabilities has been paid.
c) If the member's plans change and he decides to remain in the Home, or will be making a move that will require less funds than the original amount voted on, the funds which the Home allowed the member to set aside in preparation for his move should be returned to the Home. If he is making a move that will require less funds, the Home must give him the funds needed. If he is remaining in the Home, the Home would decide, by a two-thirds majority vote, for what purpose these funds should be allocated.
In some situations the Home member, having raised a certain amount of funds to leave the Home and travel to another area, may decide to remain in the Home or the same field after all, or his plans may change due to new circumstances. In this case, since the Home allowed the member to take time off Home duties to raise these funds, it seems only right that if the funds are not used for the purpose of the move as originally intended, then they should be returned to the Home.
If the member is moving to a closer destination, requiring less funds, the Home would give the departing member the funds needed for the move. The Home would then decide, by a two-thirds majority vote, whether to allow the member to keep the rest of the funds, or a portion of them for personal needs, etc., or whether the funds should be incorporated into the Home's coffers, or set aside for some specified Home expenditure.
If the member is remaining in the Home and not moving to a new Home, then the Home would decide, by a two-thirds majority, on the use of entire amount of funds raised by the member.
a) Members of Homes which are on Probationary Notice temporarily relinquish their Right of Mobility unless they were put on Probationary Notice due to the Home population being too large.
b) Members who have given their 30-day notice to move prior to the Home being placed on Probationary Notice retain their Right of Mobility.
The fourth stipulation that must be met before a member leaves a Home is that the Home is not on Probationary Notice. A Home that has contravened some of the conditions of the Charter may be placed on Probationary Notice and be given a set time by leadership to rectify the situation, in order to retain its DO Status. Once a Home is placed on Probationary Notice, an individual member may not give his 30-day notice until such time as the Home's Probationary Notice has been lifted. However, if he's already given notice before the Home goes on Probationary Notice, he is still free to leave the Home at the end of this 30-day period.
The one exception to this is if the Home has been put on Probationary Notice because their Home population is too large. In such a case, the only way to get off of Probationary Notice is for some of the members to move out of the Home; thus the Home members do not lose their Right of Mobility.
(1) Members of the Home can, by a two-thirds majority, appeal to their Continental Office for the Right of Mobility of a member to be temporarily suspended.
There may be an occasion when someone has caused problems in a Home which played a major part in a Home not fulfilling its responsibilities or in breaking the "Fundamental Family Rules." If this individual realizes in advance that the Home is about to be placed on Probationary Notice, he may decide to quickly put in his 30-day notice, so he won't have to remain in the Home until the Home makes the necessary changes. In such a case, since this person played a major role in the Home's problem, but could theoretically avoid having to rectify it if he were to give his notice right before the Probationary Notice goes into effect, the Home may petition the Continental Office to have the member's Right of Mobility suspended in order for him to remain and help rectify the situation.
a) Members who are on Probationary Status temporarily relinquish their Right of Mobility.
As explained in the Procedures for Placing a Member on Probationary Status (pg.106), a Home can, by a two-thirds majority, place a member of the Home on Probationary Status for up to a three-month period, as a disciplinary measure. During the assigned Probationary Status period, the member temporarily loses his Right of Mobility.
Those who have reached the age of 18 are free to open a Home in any city in the same country in which they presently live, as long as the city doesn't already have a DO Home, and it is not a "closed" city. (A Continental Office has the authority to declare a city, or some or all of the cities in a metropolitan area, as "closed," in accordance with the Procedures for Opening a Home in a City that Already Has a DO Home, to prevent further Homes from opening if deemed necessary.)
Those who have reached the age of 18, as outlined above, are free to open a Home in any city in the same country in which they presently live. No approval or clearance from Area or Continental Offices is required. If you want to pioneer a new city within your present country, you can do so solely on the authority granted to you in the above clause. However, you must notify your Area and Continental Office of your intent to move as stated earlier.
However, there may be rare, extraordinary circumstances surrounding the city of your choice that you might not be aware of. For example, you may be new in an area and not know that in the past Family members have been seriously harassed in that city. In such a case, the Continental or Area Office may propose that you select a different city to pioneer. In most cases, after learning of the matter, the team would probably decide to pioneer elsewhere. However, if they still wish to pioneer the city, they may do so. If the Continental Office feels the matter is serious enough, they may bring the matter to WS Leadership's attention and ask for their intervention.
Those who open new Homes should immediately inform their Continental Office of their mailing address so they can begin receiving their WS mailings.
Senior teens, those ages 16 and 17, may also move to a new Home providing they have their parents' written permission as outlined earlier in point A. 1. b), and two members of the new Home are at least 25 years of age. In many countries throughout the World, 16 and 17-year-olds living away from their parents with those under 25 is considered very irresponsible, and in some cases even illegal. And since the Bible says that we should "abstain from all appearance of evil" (1Thessalonians 5:22), it is best for the overall Family's sake that 16 and 17-year-olds be in Homes with older Family members. This does not take away from your Right of Mobility, it only means that if you are going to another Home, or opening a new Home, that two of your co-workers must be 25 years of age or older.
If you wish to open a Home in a city in your present country that already has one or more DO Homes, you must follow the Procedures for Opening a Home in a City That Already Has a DO Home (page 99). As in point B.1 above, if there will be senior teens in the Home, the need for having two members 25 years of age or older will apply.
Throughout the Charter when we use the term "city" we are referring to a city, town or village. Some cities are in a large metropolitan area, meaning it includes the major city and the adjacent cities and towns. For example, the actual city of Los Angeles might in itself be rather small, but the metropolitan area of Los Angeles is huge and includes a number of other cities.
In general, when referring to "cities" in the Charter, we are not talking about metropolitan areas. If a Home is already opened in the actual city of Los Angeles, you would need to follow the Procedures for Opening a Home in a City That Already Has a DO Home before opening a new Home there. However, you could open a Home in the city of Anaheim, which is another city right next to Los Angeles and which is part of metropolitan Los Angeles, without having to go through this procedure, if Anaheim does not have a DO Home in it.
However, Homes within a metropolitan area are free to conduct outreach within that whole metropolitan area. This means that if, for example, a Home opens in a suburb right outside the actual Bombay city limits, Homes within the Bombay city limits may not forbid that Home from conducting outreach in Bombay itself, since they are part of the same metropolis. This makes it possible for a Home to open in an adjacent suburb or town where it's safer, rents are often cheaper or housing more available, while still being able to conduct outreach within the city itself, unless the city is closed as outlined in Procedures for Opening a Home in a City That Already Has a DO Home, point A, page 99.
However, if a Home opens in a town that is not part of the metropolitan area, they must obtain permission from the Homes in the metropolitan area before they can conduct outreach in that metropolis.
In a city or metropolitan area that has a number of Homes, the Homes are required to create a City Council to coordinate local business or logistical matters such as witnessing areas, etc. (See Required Meetings and Activities, point D.) The City Council should include, if possible, all the Homes in the metropolitan area, not just those within the city limits. However, those on the City Council have no authority over the Homes other than that which the Homes agree to give them. Those on the City Council are not meant to be LASs or DASs, nor do they have any shepherding responsibilities or authority over the Homes in the area.
The City Council, represented by all Homes in a city or metropolis, could also agree together on where each Home can conduct outreach within the metropolitan area, so that each Home's outreach needs are sufficiently met without there being conflict over "turf."
If you are a road team Home, or if you go on a road trip from your Home, and want to witness in a metropolitan area that already has a DO Home, you will need to follow the Procedures for Opening a Home in a City That Already Has a DO Home. In other words, you must receive permission from the present Home(s) in the metropolis before doing so. It would be wise to check with your Area Office about what cities or metropolitan areas have Homes in them so that you can either go witnessing in other cities, or seek permission from the Home(s) in the city/metropolis you want to witness in before you get there.
A road team Home is one which has no fixed residence. For example, two families living in caravans moving from place to place would be a road team Home. They would send in their own TRF and would need to have their own mailing address. Such a team would need the local Home's agreement to do outreach in a city that already has a DO Home in it.
A road team Home is different from a situation where some members of a Home go out on the road for a period of time, but are still listed as members of a regular Home on that Home's TRF.
However, a road team would also need permission to do outreach in a city other than their own that has a DO Home.
If a city or a metropolitan area becomes saturated with DO Homes, the Continental Office has the authority to declare some or all of the cities in the metropolitan area as "closed," in accordance with the Procedures for Opening a Home in a City That Already Has a DO Home, to prevent further Homes from opening.
You can join any existing Home in your country if two-thirds of the voting members of that Home agree to receive you. So points B. and D. mean that you may move out of your Home and either pioneer a new Home or move into any existing Home within your present country without the prior approval of any leadership, as long as you fulfil point A. above. ("Service Homes" are explained later in the Charter under Role of a Service Home.)
Point C. allows you to open a new Home in a city that has other DO Homes, providing you follow the correct procedure.
When someone moves to another Home, it is the responsibility of the Home Teamwork of the receiving Home to first of all confirm that the incoming member is a bona fide DO member. They may also request whatever information they need about the incoming member, a résumé of his background in the Family, details of any debts or liabilities he might have, and so forth. The receiving Home is also entitled to ask for a recommendation from the member's present Home, and other Officers, if they so desire. (See Guidelines for Member Evaluation Form in Appendix B.) This is normally a wise thing to do.
When a Home receives a request from someone to join their Home, they should reply within 30 days. The reply might not necessarily be a yes or a no, it may be a request for more information. However, the Home should try to give a final reply, either granting or denying clearance, within a reasonable amount of time.
If you are going to join an existing Home, you have the right to know if the Home has debts or liabilities, as once you join it, you would then be responsible for a portion of them. You can ask, and they must tell you, what the amount of your portion of the debts and liabilities would amount to. The receiving Home may, if two-thirds of the Home agrees, waive all or some of your portion of the Home's debt or liability they may have accumulated up to the time you join.
In order to avoid future misunderstandings, it would be wise for the incoming member to ask the Business Teamworker to write down the amount of his portion of the Home's debt or liabilities.
a) At least 50% of the net income generated through the member's fundraising activities is to be used for no purpose other than the payment of the debts and liabilities.
Since you normally are unable to leave a Home until your portion of its debts and liabilities is paid, it would be quite unusual for this clause to be used. However, there will be times that a Home must close immediately, perhaps because of persecution, or the owner decides he's going to sell the house and you must leave immediately. In such a case, even though they no longer live in the Home, the Home members may still have a portion of their debts and liabilities to pay. (This is covered later in the Responsibilities of the DO Home: Regarding Financial Matters section of the Charter, pg.52.) In such a case, the receiving Home has the right to know of any new member's debt or liability ahead of time since they will need to assume this amount due or allow time for the new member to raise the funds to pay his portion of it.
The incoming member should also inform the Home of any upcoming expenses that the new member may generate in the near future. For example, if the new member and his family must take a visa trip within the next month or so, they should inform the new Home of that fact ahead of time, so the Home will be aware of this upcoming expense.
Although we are all expected to live Acts 2:44,45 in our Family Homes, joining a new Home is a big step, and sometimes after a short while, people find they have different burdens or goals or are otherwise not compatible with the other members of the Home. Although a departing member is responsible to fulfill all of the Charter requirements before leaving the Home, in order to do all we can to encourage our missionaries to venture out and seek out teams to work together with to fulfill God's Great Commission, we have added the above clause to make the separation as easy as possible, should the Home and a new member find after a short while that they are not suited to working together.
Just as we have a formal trial period before marriage, we feel it is a good plan to have a similar arrangement when people first join a Home. This will ensure that families or individuals who leave a Home before the first two months have passed will know exactly what they will be able to take with them when they depart. This will help to ensure that departing members will not have to leave without sufficient needs for moving to another Home, or for opening their own Home.
For instance, if a family joins another Home with a car and caravan, some furniture, cash, a computer, etc., before they move in it should be decided which of these items they would take with them if they decide to leave the Home before the end of the first two months.
You have the right to move to other countries, either within your CRO Area or in another CRO Area. The Member Evaluation Form has now been discontinued. All clearance applications now only need to include the application form and a Want Ad, unless the applicant wants to open their own new Home in a city presently without a Home, in which case only the Clearance Application Form is needed to apply for clearance. The Continental Office will decide whether or not to publish the individual's Want Ad. If a Want Ad is published, this would also signify that clearance has been granted.
Those wishing to move must also inform their Area Office (ABM). Once they give their notice, they lose the right to vote on Home matters, and are freed of any responsibility for new financial obligations or debts the Home incurs.
The clause also states that you should inform the Area Office of your planned destination. If you are going to be a road team Home, you may not know your exact location, but you should at least try to outline your general plans so your ABM is kept aware of your movement and plans within the Area. (When you leave the Home, the Home should also make mention in the personnel section of your TRF of your departure and destination.)
The Continental Office cannot deny clearance to a member, nor their mate or children, who want to return to their home country. So if you are British, with an American mate, and you are planning to leave your Home in India, then the Continental Offices cannot deny you clearance to either Britain or the U.S. This does not mean that you don't need to request and receive clearance before you go, it's just that the Continental Office can't deny the clearance. (We will refer to this type of clearance as "automatic clearance.") Therefore, you can't return to your Home country until you've actually received clearance—which cannot be denied—but you must wait for clearance.
To add to the above scenario, if the British-American couple described above have a child born in Brazil who is issued a Brazilian passport, the couple and their children would not be eligible for "automatic clearance" to Brazil since the child is not a "voting member." (However, once the child reaches 16 years of age, he would then be eligible for "automatic clearance" to Brazil, although his parents would not. In addition, if the teen holds a U.S. and/or British passport, then he would be eligible for automatic clearance for Britain and/or the U.S.)
The intent of this clause is to allow members to return to their home country. In the case of Europeans with EU passports, this "automatic clearance" only applies to going to the member's home country.
The Right of Mobility has set forth the proper methods for moving out of a Home, but this in no way is meant to apply to temporary movement. There will be occasions when someone will want to visit another Home for a period of time, in order to perhaps visit loved ones, or to help the Home in some way. Decisions regarding such matters are to be decided upon by the Homes involved. It is our hope that the Homes will continue to welcome Family members with open arms who wish to visit for whatever reason. By the same token, if your Home has someone who is gifted with some talent, such as an excellent handyman, and another Home temporarily needs his services, we trust that your two Homes will be able to lovingly arrange to let him go to help.
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5. RIGHT OF REDRESS
The definition of redress is: "To set right, to remedy or rectify," or "the satisfaction for wrong or injury." The Right of Redress is included in the Charter so that if and when your or someone else's individual rights are infringed upon, you can report it and expect some disciplinary measures to take place against those who have caused harm. The Right of Redress will go into effect from April 1, 1995, and covers situations that occur from that time onward.
Jesus said, "Moreover, if thy brother shall trespass against thee, go and tell him his fault between thee and him alone: if he shall hear thee, thou hast gained thy brother. But if he will not hear thee, then take with thee one or two more, that in the mouth of two or three witnesses every word may be established. And if he shall neglect to hear them, tell it unto the church" (Matthew 18:15-17).
If your rights are being infringed upon, you have the right to speak up about it and to expect it to be remedied. If you see someone else's rights being infringed upon, you have both the right and the responsibility to report it as well.
First, in Scriptural fashion, you are to bring up the matter to the person who's doing it, and then, if that doesn't rectify the situation, you should bring it up to your Home Teamwork. There may be times when you don't feel you can bring the matter up directly to the person, in which case you can seek help from the Home Teamwork. If the situation is serious enough, or the erring member doesn't change his ways within a reasonable amount of time, the Teamwork should bring the matter before all the voting members of the Home.
A "reasonable amount of time" depends on what the infringement is and what the harm is. If, for example, if the Business Teamworker on your Home Teamwork has not been informing the Home of the financial state well enough, and a member of the Home feels that he isn't being kept informed, which he has the right to be, he can bring it up to the Teamworker, as well as to the Home and say, "I think we need to be informed better, so we need to have a council meeting to discuss finances." In that case a reasonable amount of time might be a few days or even a week. It depends on the problem, how serious it is, and whether or not it's causing harm.
As mentioned earlier, this Right of Redress is not only a personal right, but you are also expected to be your brother's keeper. "Failure to report a crime is a crime" (ML #662:22; DB7).
a) Such requests must be sent to the appropriate Area and Continental Offices.
(1) Such requests may also be sent to Maria if so desired.
If you feel the situation is very serious, or if it is not taken care of after you have followed the steps outlined above, then you can take the next step of informing the Area and Continental Office of the situation. You should send a report by mail or modem as soon as possible. If you want to send a copy to Maria, you may.
a) If, through investigation, confirmation is made that the rights of the member have been infringed upon, resulting in physical, spiritual, mental or emotional harm, appropriate and proportionate discipline must be assigned to the offending member(s); the offended member, and those who reported the offense, must be informed of the action taken.
b) If, through investigation, it is found that the entire Home was negligent in protecting the rights of the member, the entire Home must be appropriately and proportionately disciplined; the offended member, and those who reported the offense, must be informed of the action taken.
c) If, through investigation, it is decided that the member's rights have not been infringed upon, the Area Office must inform the member who alleged he was offended as well as those who reported the matter.
If someone is found to be causing harm, then some discipline must be meted out. The discipline should be appropriate and proportionate to the offense. Depending on what they did and how much harm they caused, they could be admonished or given some form of minor discipline, or put on Probationary Status, or moved to TRF Supporter Status, or be excommunicated. If someone consistently fails to follow the Child Discipline Rules with their children, then strong disciplinary measures, such as Probationary Status or TRF Supporter Status, would have to be meted out. On the other hand, if it was just a minor offense, then the discipline wouldn't have to be so severe. But the offended member and those who reported it must be informed that discipline was taken. Likewise, they must be informed if the investigation proves that the alleged offender was found not to be at fault.
We once again come back to the fact that we are each responsible and accountable for our actions. We are also responsible for the actions of our Home.
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6. RESPONSIBILITIES OF PARENTS
The Family believes that children are a gift from God, given to their parents to love, care for, and to raise in a Godly manner. Primary responsibility for the welfare of children rests with their parents, but because of our faith and cooperative lifestyle, the raising of Family children is also a community affair, as parents share the child-rearing duties together with others in the Home. The members of the Home participate in the upbringing of the children, and as such also have a responsibility for their welfare and are responsible to help love and care for the children. The final decision concerning the welfare of the children rests with their parents. Each Home has a responsibility to support its parents and provide an environment where both the parents and the Home can meet their responsibilities towards their children, both individually and communally.
As Dad so clearly stated in "One Wife" (ML #249), we are all responsible for the care of our Family children and we need to treat each of them as if they were our own. We are all responsible for each child and we must each endeavor to help our children in every way we can. The raising of the children in our Homes is a united effort, and everyone is involved in some way or another.
However, since the Lord gave children to specific parents, the primary responsibility for them rests with the parents. This doesn't mean that they must be the ones who take care of them the most, but the final responsibility rests with the parents to make sure that their children are getting the care they need. If some child is not getting proper care, perhaps the Home is being negligent and thus is partly to blame, but the ultimate blame rests with the parents, as they must ensure that their children are being properly cared for, and if they're not, they should try to remedy the situation or move to some other situation where the children will be well cared for.
This does not mean that parents are now supposed to set their own childcare standards in each Home. As with everything, the methods and manner of raising children within the Home are to be decided by the Home's voting members, and parents are expected to comply with majority decisions. If the parents don't agree, they can try to get the Home to change the way they do things, using the procedures set forth in this Charter, or they can move to a Home that operates more to their liking.
Each parent or guardian of children in the Family is responsible to:
Although it is the responsibility of the Home to make sure that all of the children in the Home are raised in a Godly manner, loved and have all of their needs met, are protected from all forms of abuse and receive a proper education, it is ultimately the parents' responsibility to ensure their children's well-being.
If the Home has poor schooling or no Word time for the children, or they don't allot time for get-out on a regular basis, then it's up to the parents to speak up in an attempt to change the Home, or to get their children into another Home. They can first explain to the Teamwork and the Home that they feel the rights of their children are being violated, and that according to the Right of Redress something needs to be done. If nothing changes, they can seek the help of their VSs or they can move to another Home.
All school-age children in the Family should have academic records kept up to date. Besides being proof of the children's schooling and educational ability, it will also ensure that, should the parents and their children change Homes in the future, those who would help in their schooling will know exactly what the children have learned, so that the children will be able to continue their schooling at their present level. The basic records that need to be kept for children's home schooling, no matter what program they are using, are: (1) attendance record; (2) a log of scholastic activities; and (3) each student's portfolio, made up of selected school work plus photos and records, etc., of other educational activities. The Progress Reports and Cumulative Record Cards which are available in the Home Schooling Kit are optional.
This doesn't mean that each parent must personally fill out all of their children's home schooling academic records, but that it is their responsibility to make sure that someone is doing it. If the teachers or care-givers aren't, or can't do it, then the parents will have to do it themselves. It is the parents who have the ultimate responsibility for their children's education, and are the ones responsible to ensure that such records are kept regularly.
Parents should inform themselves of the education laws of the country in which they reside, as some countries may require that home-schooled children be tested or meet other requirements.
All of these parental responsibilities are also listed as Home responsibilities later on in the Charter. The Home is expected to supply needed medical care and eye and dental check-ups. But if the Home isn't doing so, then it is again the responsibility of the parents to ensure that their children get the proper care they need, and if this care cannot be supplied by that Home, then it is the parents' obligation to move to a Home in which it can be supplied.
The care of our Family children is the responsibility of us all, and we must unitedly do all we can to properly care for them. Stating that children's school records, medical needs, etc., are the parents' ultimate responsibility doesn't mean that the Home members should think, "Well, since it's the parents' responsibility, we don't have to concern ourselves with raising the finances to meet these needs, as the parents have to take care of it." We are merely stating that ultimately the final responsibility rests with the parents.
Dad said, "They are the children of the Family, therefore the entire Family is responsible for them, not just those that happen to be their physical parents" (ML #688:48).
Parents or guardians should keep health and medical records for each of their children. (For sample forms, see "Heavenly Helpers 2," pages 134 and 135, or the Student Health Record in the "Home Schooling Program.")
Since we live communally and we all play a part in the care of our children, it is necessary for each of us to discipline the children according to a united disciplinary standard. The "Family Discipline Guidelines" (ML #2919, GN 591) were written to offer assistance to this end.
In each Home the voting members must decide their Home's disciplinary standard within the boundaries set by the "Family Discipline Guidelines." Once this is agreed upon by the Home, the parents should wholeheartedly attempt to discipline their children accordingly if they wish to remain a part of that Home.
No one is permitted to discipline their children more severely than what is allowed in the "Family Discipline Guidelines." If they do, they will be violating the rights of the child and "Fundamental Family Rules," and will be in jeopardy of losing their DO Status.
If the Home has decided unitedly that its children are to be disciplined in a certain manner if they engage in a certain activity or manifest certain behavior, then when they are in the care of their parents, it is the parents' responsibility to discipline their children accordingly if their children do engage in that activity or manifest that behavior, so there will be equality in the discipline of all of the children in the Home.
If parents do not like the disciplinary standard that the Home has voted on, then it's their responsibility to try to change it, or move to a Home where they are in agreement with the Home's disciplinary standard, or start their own Home.
Parents must make sure their children know how to contact them if they're not residing in the same Home as their children, or if the parents are likely to be away for any significant length of time.
The parents should let their children know (at an appropriate age, probably by 6 years old) what their rights are under the Charter, so the children will know if their rights are being infringed upon. (See Rights of the Children, pg.38.)
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7. RIGHTS OF PARENTS
Members who are parent(s) or guardian(s) of children in the Family have the right to:
Parent Time and Family Day are requirements listed in the Required Meetings and Activities section of the "Fundamental Family Rules." This is to ensure that parents living in the same Home with their children get to spend time with them on a regular basis.
a) Both parents can live apart from their children if they are members of World Services and there is a suitable guardian for the children.
Parents have the right to have their offspring under the age of 18 live in the same Home as they do, if they wish. Those 16 and 17 have the Right of Mobility only if they have permission from at least one of their parents. (See Right of Mobility for rules governing 16 and 17-year-olds.) Those 14 and 15 do not have the Right of Mobility. Nevertheless, if they express the desire to live in another Home, and at least one of their parents living with them gives permission, they may do so; providing the receiving Home is also in agreement, of course.
A parent can choose to live apart from his or her children if involved in some specialized ministry or calling that would necessitate their living apart from their children, but they can't be required to live apart. There may be times when one parent may need to be away from his or her mate and children in order to fulfil some mission or calling from the Lord, such as serving in a dangerous or distant mission field, or one which would be unsuitable for children. Or the parent may have gifts and talents which are needed in a special situation, such as a Service Home which for some reason would not be able to receive children. In such cases, the decision to live apart from their children would be made by the parent, in consultation with their mate and, if possible, with their children.
The only exception to this is if the parents are permanently separated and have worked out a custody arrangement between themselves, and one parent may not be living with some, or any, of their children. In such a case, one parent can't demand to live with the children that are in the custody of the other parent. Marital separations are covered more fully in the Permanent Marital Separation Rules in the "Fundamental Family Rules" (pg.159).
In the rare event that both parents are away from their underage children for any significant length of time, they should give written permission to someone in the Home to act as the temporary guardian in their absence, authorizing them to decide in case of emergency medical matters.
- Every parent who has a child in our Family had either better be in the Family and have the child with them.—Or, if the child is temporarily staying with others, they'd better have a written legal document of some kind showing that the family that is keeping the child has written legal permission to have him! (ML #2496:71.)
- Be kept informed of the location, have a current address and/or telephone number, and have contact with their children who do not reside in the same Home as the parent(s).
Parents who have children that live in other Homes, cities or countries have the right to know where they are and to have contact with them.
- Be kept informed on a regular basis of the spiritual, physical and educational well-being of their children under the age of 18.
- For parent(s) residing with their children, "regular basis" is determined by a simple majority vote of the Home.
- For parent(s) not residing with their children, "regular basis" is not less than once during every three-month period.
Parents are entitled to know the physical, spiritual and educational well-being of each of their children, and they should be informed of such on a regular basis. If they live in the same Home as their children, this is unlikely to be a problem as they will be living with their children and will regularly see and talk with those caring for and teaching their children, if they are not doing it themselves. They will already be having regular Parent Time and Family Days, and they will be attending the required Childcare/Parenting meetings. For those parents living in the same Home with their children, the minimum "regular basis" is decided on by the Home's voting members.
Parents residing with their children can at any time, of course, ask the child's teacher or care-giver about their children's welfare and progress. However, certain activities such as going over the children's records and discussing their school work would probably be scheduled by the Home during Childcare/Parenting meetings. Hopefully, with smaller Homes, it will be easier for the parents to be in touch and kept well informed on how their children are doing, since many of them will likely be playing a larger role in the care of their children.
If the child lives in a different Home than the parents, the parents must be informed of the overall state of their child no less than once every three months. (See Child Progress Report form in Appendix B.) This is the minimum; it can't be less than that, but it can be more if the parent works out a mutually acceptable arrangement with those in the Home where the child is living. It would be desirable for the child and parents to correspond with each other once a month, if possible.
If the teen or child is going through a difficult period, or in the case of a serious sickness or accident, we would, of course, encourage more frequent communication with the parents, if possible, to gain their needed prayer, support and counsel.
Every Family parent is entitled to receive help from their Home in the physical, spiritual and educational care of their children. The Home must decide, by a two-thirds majority, what constitutes "sufficient assistance" in their Home, and the extent of the help that is possible for the Home to provide. For example, the parent might feel that sufficient assistance is having someone take care of their children full-time and that they are only responsible for them at Parent Time. The Home may look at it much differently. It is up to the Home's voting members to discuss and determine what assistance they can give.
Sufficient assistance might not be equal in every case. For example, someone who is on full-time outreach or is away from the Home on a road trip may need more childcare help than the person who is at the Home all day. Or a single parent may be assigned a teen helper to assist them during Parent Time, or a Parenting teamwork situation be worked out for them, if possible. Each situation will have to be worked out by the Home, and in doing so, the main consideration must be the welfare of the children.
The Bible says, "Honor widows that are widows indeed. Pure religion and undefiled before God and the Father is this, to visit the fatherless and widows in their affliction, and to keep himself unspotted from the World" (1Timothy 5:3; James 1:27).
Our single parents, especially single moms, are our widows. Many of them no longer have their mates for one reason or another, and that in itself is a traumatic experience. Besides overcoming their loss, and the battles that accompany it, they must adjust to being a single parent, which is very difficult.
Other women are single moms because they bravely, lovingly, sacrificially and willingly shared with either outsiders during the FFing days, or with Family men. They laid down their lives for the brethren. They obeyed the Lord and gave of themselves, and were blessed with a precious child. As with all of our Family children, we are all responsible to help care for them, and in the case of single parents we must do all we can to help make it easier for them to raise their children.
Being a single parent is difficult in that you must be both father and mother to your children. Of course, it is much easier to be a single parent in the Family than out of the Family, as within the Family you have a great deal more help and support. But even with that help it is still difficult. Homes must therefore pay special attention to the needs of single parents and their children. The Home must do its best to make sure their need for assistance and additional care is met. This may mean finding someone in the Home who would be willing to assist as a parenting teamworker, who actively helps with the care of the children, and who the single parent can counsel and work together with in the care of the children.
A single parent is one who has children residing with them, but who does not have a mate living with them. Those who have children whose mate is away most of the time should receive the same consideration as a single parent.
Single parents whose mates are not in the Family might want to consider giving legal guardianship to a Family couple in case of their death or debilitating injury.
When a child is sick, the parents are to have the final decision as to whether medical help is needed or not. The Home Teamwork can counsel with the parents, and the Home can pray and hear from the Lord about the matter, but in the end, the parents are the ones who have the final say. As voting members, we are assuming that 16 and 17-year-olds will make their own decisions regarding medical matters which affect them. However, in areas where this is not legal, if the teens are living away from their parents, they should have a letter granting an adult member of the Home the authorization to act in place of the parents in case of any medical emergency.
In a case where the parents are living away from their child and the child requires serious medical attention, the guardians should make the immediate decision but should inform and counsel with the parents at the earliest possible opportunity, and continue to keep them informed.
It is up to the parents to decide if and how much contact their children under the age of 16 will have with their non-DO relatives, which includes mates or siblings who have left the DO Family and relatives who were never Family members. "Contact" covers both visitation and correspondence with these relatives.
The parents can read the correspondence of their minor child if they wish. This doesn't mean they must read it, but that they reserve the right to. This covers both incoming and outgoing mail. However, the parents should not open their children's mail, but can ask the child if they can read it either before the letter has been sealed or after it has been opened. The exception to this is if the child is writing directly to the Continental Office or to Mama. Such letters should be confidential, if the child so desires.
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8. RIGHTS OF THE CHILDREN
It's very important to clarify what rights our Family children have, so that everyone knows exactly what they must do to properly care for them. As Dad said, "Nothing is more important than God's children and their care, for they are His Kingdom!" (ML #315:30). This section covers the rights of those under the age of 16. Although those under the age of 16 do not have the same rights as voting members, it should be understood that as children get older they should be given a greater degree of personal autonomy. For instance, a 12 to 15-year-old child should be given more responsibility and freedom of choice than a 10-year-old, and likewise a 10-year-old greater than a 6-year-old. Once someone reaches age 16, they have the rights of a voting member, which are covered under the Responsibilities and Rights of Individual DO Family Members, unless specified otherwise in the Charter.
In this section there are fewer comments made after the points because the majority of the points are self-explanatory.
Children under the age of 16 have the right to:
All of our children have the right to an adequate education that allows them to become as competent as they should be for their age, in a variety of subjects. The definition of "adequate" is "sufficient to satisfy a requirement or meet a need." So they need to have an education that meets the need for them to become competent in these subjects in a manner appropriate for their age. Thus a six-year-old should be educated at least to the proper level for a six-year-old, taking into consideration their ability and aptitude. The minimum amount of school hours is listed in the Scholastic and Schedule Rules in the "Fundamental Family Rules" (pg.122).
If a child wishes to receive more education in a certain field of study, they may do so if their parents agree. It would be up to the child to explain their desire to the parents, and up to the parents to see if the Home can comply. If not, the parents will have to decide whether they want to move to a Home that can.
If the child/teen wants to get local testing, such as the GED test in the U.S., which is a high school equivalency test, or whatever testing might be available, so that they can get credit for their education, then they have the right to do so. If it's not possible for the Home to provide the means for the child to get such testing, then the parents are free to move with the child to another Home that can provide it.
Although the children have the right to live with at least one of their parents, the children should understand that this does not necessarily mean that they have the right to choose which parent they live with, as this is decided by the parents, though the views of the children should be sought and taken into consideration. In the case of a permanent marital separation, the division of the children will be decided upon by the parents, and once that decision is made, then the children will live with their respective parent unless further mutually agreed-upon arrangements are made. Such decisions should take the needs of the children into consideration and should be made in the best interests of the children. (This is covered in more detail in the Permanent Marital Separation Rules in the "Fundamental Family Rules," pg.159.)
If a child is living apart from his or her parent(s), they have the right to be in contact with them, and if not physically possible, at least by mail. They must know, or have available, an address to write their parents, and must feel the freedom to write them whenever they need or want to. The Teamwork and those in the Home must understand that it is the child's right to have contact, and at the very least, be able to write their parents, so they must make time available for the child to do so. If practical and workable, children should be able to visit the absent DO parent on occasion, though many factors would determine if this is practical.
If as a parent you are living apart from your children, and your children write you, you should answer their letters, as it assures them of your love.
Children are entitled to Parent Time with their parents. If the Home is fulfilling the Required Meetings and Activities in the "Fundamental Family Rules," then children will be having the needed time with their parents and brothers and sisters.
When a child needs medical attention, he has the right to receive it. The final decision is to be made by the parent, in counsel with the child, if age-appropriate.