Keeping the Faith and Leaving the Army: TRF Supporters of the Lord's Endtime Family

Charlotte Hardman

University of Newcastle

He drew a circle that shut me out. But I drew a circle that brought him in! ("Other Sheep" Mo Letter, No. 167/1972)

The Family are an international group of Fundamentalist Christian missionaries, better known under their old name, the Children of God. In the last few years they have had to confront an intensive anti-Family campaign. Since 1990, this campaign has culminated in charges of child sexual abuse being filed against them in Spain, Australia, Argentina, and France. In each case they have been acquitted; no evidence of abuse could be found.

Since 1991 I have been carrying out research on the Family as part of a more general research project looking at children in new religious movements.' I became interested in the group of "TRF Supporters" after being invited to one of their big fellowship meetings in London in 1993. 1 was excited when I realized that here was a lay congregation of Family supporters who shared beliefs and goals with the Family, yet chose to live a different lifestyle. This group offered children in the Family an important possibility of experimenting with an alternative to remaining in the full-time missionary Family, without having to leave the movement completely. As with many other new religious movements, the options prior to the introduction of TSers had been a clear-cut IN or OUT. For some second generation members, safe experimentation with the outside world was what they wanted, in order to help them make up their own minds about leaving or staying with the Family. TSers offer Family children a half-way house.

To explain the terminology, "TRF Supporters" (also known as TSers) is a term introduced to the Family in 1989 to describe "saved" ex-missionaries of the Family, ex-disciples of the Army of the Lord's Endtime Family, who continue to keep the faith and support their work in witnessing and saving souls but no longer live in "disciple only homes." The term TRF (Tithing Report Forms) is used by the Family to refer to the forms filled in by all "disciple only homes" and hence also came to mean "full-time member."' TRF Supporters now live independently, without Shepherds, deciding themselves the extent to which they adopt Family culture and rules. They continue to send their monthly tithing report and 10% of their income to World Services. The following paper looks at who the TRF supporters are, their status within the Family and how this is linked to the historical situation in which they emerged as a category in the Family, what they offer children in the way of an alternative, and what they reflect about Family values and beliefs.

Historical Background to the TRF Supporter Classification

The new classification was introduced at a time when a large number of Family members were returning to the US and Europe after intensive missionary work in the East. By the end of 1989, according to Family statistics, the Family population in Europe had increased by 25% and in North America by 38%. This was the result of the new restrictive visa policies in India and the leader Moses (Mo or Dad) Berg's positive reaction to everyone returning to their home countries—to their home fields. "Even though we're now having to leave some of the foreign Eastern fields and having to go home to the West, the Lord is blessing us with a new harvest in the West." The Homes at this stage had become much larger. Whereas in 1988 there had been 701 communities, by 1989 this had been reduced to 388—and with a population of 12,419, the average Home size was now 38. With larger Homes there was a need for close cooperative living in a way that had not been demanded of members since about 1979.

The stream of missionaries from the East and the larger size of Homes strengthened "the Army of the Lord," and at the same time highlighted both the problems some people were facing in, for example, keeping up with the pace of working at 100% demanded of disciples, and the inability of some members to stick to Family regulations. Given the growing number of teens as well as the returning missionaries, there were now more than enough people in the Army. It was also apparent that some disciples were handing over "Disciples Only" literature to anti-cultists, who were using the material against the Family, and this was further reason for tightening the Family. The diminishing loyalty of a few members was mentioned in an advisory from World Services:

... there are a number of weak folks who continue to receive DO mailings simply because they tithe and supposedly remain reasonably loyal ... a number of these weak people spend much of their time sitting around drinking beer, smoking, criticizing the Family and murmuring.

Now that we have discovered that our internal publications and inside info is being leaked to our enemies and the anti-cult network, the Lord is spotlighting these home fields, and many of these weak or independent supposed Family members are being brought into question. ("Tightening up our Family," 1989)

The focus of the Family in 1989 was, then, to raise the standard of behavior of its members, to totally eliminate from the Family those who would not obey Family rules, and to keep as a supportive group those who were still loyal but needed a different style of life. Every Home was visited and every adult interviewed by their National Shepherd. The news bulletin that was sent out at the time went as follows:

For any individual TRFers or Homes who are not reinstated to full D.O. mailings after their Home is visited, we would like to announce the establishment of a new reporting status. With the understanding that individuals of Homes who are not fully reinstated would still want to continue to tithe to the Lord's Work and would want to receive Family mailings, this new concentric circle of TRF disciples is being established.-"TRF Supporters."

TSers would receive much of the Family literature but not all Mo letters, Good News or directional literature and they were no longer held by Family regulations, communal lifestyle or the high standards of dedication required; they could be independent, pursue their own goals, live as they wished with their own families without having to answer to Family leaders. "TRF Supporter" status was given to those who might benefit from a different lifestyle and to give independence to those who clearly wanted more independence than the Family Army could offer. Disciples were expected to work for the common goal and give up personal ambitions.

There were several reasons for the introduction of the TS programme; one was tightening up the Army; another was bringing policy into line with practice. There were Family members already living in a style more like that of TRF Supporters than disciples; there was clearly a demand for a support group of people who did not have to be part of the "front line troops." Members of the Family themselves constantly use the military image to describe their roles. They talk about the "main fighting force" and the TSers as the "reserves" who want to be in the battle.

After RNR (1978-1981) there was a lot of coming and going. The Family had not been a "community" in the way that it is now-they had all been "doing their own thing," earning their own living and living mostly in units of couples and children. There were people who wanted to maintain this way of life. "The TS programme was the answer. Before it had been a black or white/all or nothing situation." After RNR when the Family was trying to live in communities again, there were rules and some members felt they were struggling to "make the grade" yet didn't want to leave the movement. At the time there was a contradiction in supporting the Family and its goals whilst questioning the degree of commitment required. "All the little rules and we found it hard to apply them all the time." Some wanted to leave but didn't want their children to leave; they felt they couldn't themselves give the kind of education and training the Family can offer. Communal living was a struggle for others:

It's against human nature to take other people into your home & share everything. It was our own weakness that we couldn't live with others. I simply had a battle with communal living.

Others missed the comforts of life. "The Family has a simple lifestyle and we found it hard to live so frugally." As one TSer put it:

Now, it's up to us how far we want to go. We're still Christians and we want to help the Family. But we're more individuals-we have freedom and choice to do what we want. In the Family as DO it's 100% commitment. Even people who want to join can't unless they have gone through 6 months of waiting and trying it out.

Other adults were faced with teens who did not want to live their lives as disciples serving the Lord in the Family and the Family had to find a way of dealing with them.

The emergence of the TS-ers is seen as having helped the group understand, define and satisfy an already existing demand, given the wide variety of people brought together in the movement. Deciding whether someone should be DO or TSer

involved discernment of the Holy Spirit. If someone has real commitment then maybe they should be disciple and not TRF Supporter, whereas for some maybe it's best for them to have a job and become a TSer. If people don't want to surrender some of their autonomy and work for the common purpose or they get fed up with the schedules and the rules then they will probably be happier as TSer.

The TSer classification was a solution, after two previous and unsatisfactory strategies, to the problem of those who, though loyal, detract from the evangelical fervor, smooth running and exciting pace of the fight to save souls. The Army of Family disciples have to work 100%, accepting schedules and rules. In the past discipline and authoritarianism and then extreme tolerance were both tried. In the Chain of Cooperation, for example, the method of dealing with problems was, I gather, at times heavy-handed and dogmatic, to try and overcome the slackness that had come about as a result of the RNR period in which people had operated "according to their own faith."

You just cannot have everybody running loose or you're going to have some key bad conduct ... we're no longer a bunch of harem-scarem, wild and woolly-headed hippies! . . . We're going to have to start excommunicating people who don't set a good example and are not good samples of our Family, lest the community thinks that's us! (The Future is here-And Needs Leaders, ML 1200, 1982)

In contrast to any over zealous and ruthless handling of problems, the Fellowship Revolution of 1981 emphasized cooperation and fellowship, and communities were encouraged to tolerate people who were perhaps not suited to the kind of rigorous life demanded of a Family disciple. To ask members themselves to be realistic about the kind of life they want to lead and to offer them the alternative as a TS-er reflects the generally more mature and tolerant attitude of the Family.

Berg wrote a significant letter in 1972 called "Other Sheep." It is still a key letter today, relevant to the introduction of the TRF Supporter Program. The letter reminds members of the Family that there are Christians outside of the Family, that they don't have to be in the Family to be Christians, that the Family had been extreme in the past in order to prove their ideal works, and that "Other Sheep," including ex-disciples, should be included somehow into the flock.

I HAVE ALREADY SAID THAT WE NEED TO ACCEPT MANY OUTSIDERS AS ASSOCIATES AND FRIENDS. May I suggest that we do the same for Jesus People who are interested in us: Welcome their fellowship, share our literature ... Ban doctrinal arguments, condemnation and accusations! Love never fails...

WE USED TO HAVE THREE GRADES..... IF AFTER COMPLETING ANY ONE OF THESE ... A STUDENT DID NOT WISH TO CONTINUE IN OUR SCHOOL OR WAS NOT EVEN SUITABLE or capable of continuing to a higher level of leadership, and wanted to go home, we didn't call him a "Backslider" .. . we called him a "Graduate" . . . with a Graduation Certificate and our blessing to show he'd done the best he could, and we hoped he'd be a better Christian and a good witness for the Lord ... even though he didn't qualify for all-out, full-time service.

AS A RESULT, WE KEPT MANY OF OUR "GRADUATES" AS FRIENDS and co-workers, who continued to fellowship with us, pray for us, root for us, and even help to support us for years afterward, some of them even returning to go on with the Lord later.

WHY CAN'T WE HAVE: (1) DISCIPLES-Full-time members of our Colonies, the 100 percenters who have taken our training and are serving the Lord full time with us. (2) GRADUATES-Those who have gone as far as they feel able, but don't feel suited to our type of life or ministry, and hopefully go back home to serve the Lord as best they can. (3) ASSOCIATES—Those who do not feel able to forsake all and join us, but love us, like to fellowship with us and help us all they can.

DISCIPLES WERE NOT THE ONLY CHRISTIANS! ... we should be as merciful and patient as possible with those who are following as far and as fast as they can, even though they may seem far behind us. (ML "Other Sheep," No 167, 1972)

The letter ends with the recollection of and comment on the line of a poem (quoted at the beginning of this article), "'He drew a circle that shut me out. But I drew a circle that brought him in!' Beloved, can't we do this with the Lord's 'Other Sheep'?" The introduction of TSers does this; it brings ex-disciples closer to the main army than any other category, such as "Catacombers," "Live-outs," and DFers. Catacombers are usually young people who want to become full-time disciples but are not considered ready, either because they are too young (i.e., under 18), have not finished their studies, or have other commitments outside the Family. Live-outs are older people with families and jobs whose commitments have never allowed them to become full-time disciples. DFers are those who receive the publication "Daily Food"—lay people who have received Jesus into their hearts and want to remain in Fellowship with the Family without ever wanting to be missionaries or disciples. Members of these categories have never been disciples as is the case with the TSers.

Status of TSers

In spite of the "Other Sheep" letter and the demand for something like a TS programme, most TRF Supporters nevertheless feel they have low status in relation to the disciples. None of the TS teens I spoke to felt they could talk about TSers and DOs as being equal but different. More common was the following feeling: "We feel embarrassed if we bump into DOs. What they're doing is exciting; we're just stuck with being TS because of our family." Several factors contribute to the lower status of TSers. Firstly, TSers do not receive all the literature that Family disciples do; they are therefore excluded from the most recent policies and orientations of the Family. "We don't have Good News or the Stuff from Dad, so we don't hear the latest, what the different revolutions are; we only hear about them through the grapevine." Second, inevitably the fact that the programme began as part of a process of "Tightening the Army" to make it more efficient has also contributed to the low status. As we have seen, at the time when the TS classification was first introduced some members were considered to be "the weak folks" who were sinning and committing offenses, unlike the "very dedicated folks," and these "weak" ones were asked to leave the Family or become TS. The people who were chosen to remain in the Family Army were the "folks we can count on." The letter "D.O. is for Doers of the Word" issued at the same time as the bulletin about the new TS programme made clear what behaviour was considered as offenses, sins or weaknesses, and whether people were to be demoted, reclassified or excommunicated. Behavior for which people would be excommunicated included bootlegging D.O. literature, sex with outsiders, sex with minors, violent behaviour, sex with new adult disciples in the Family less than six months, sex with outsiders, sex with minors (anyone under 21). The less serious offenses which were nevertheless still considered to be "offenses" included unbelief in the Letters, being critical of Father David, the Family or the Letters, persistent murmurers, troublemakers and "bad apples"; failure to obey Family rules or leadership, smoking, excessive drinking, excessive reading of worldly books, continual listening to System rock music etc. People who had been struggling with such "weaknesses," and for whom even many years of prayer and counseling within the group made no difference, were asked to become TRF Supporters. It was felt that if the weaknesses had been disruptive of the community over a considerable time and no improvements had been made, then it was only fair that the individuals should be asked to sort out the problem themselves.

In the years subsequent to the Chain of Cooperation (when some leaders had abused their power and use of discipline) there was a general concern to have a truly compassionate and loving style of shepherding. There was a definite emphasis on understanding problems that disciples had in their ministries and their relations with other members; on trying to inspire rather than condemn. Nevertheless, the Family has standards, it has rules and regulations. "Try and run an Army without them," I was told.

In order to maintain standards, the Family has adopted a general emphasis on overcoming personal weaknesses and cultivating Christian virtues in everyone in the Family. They believe that the ability to act unselfishly and sacrificially depends upon spiritual strength and maturity, and that once people are saved they have the potential to live the Law of Love by which people know how to act rightfully and lovingly. Nevertheless, I was repeatedly told, everyone has NWOs "Needs to Work On"-the Family term for weaknesses and bad habits. It is believed these can be worked on with prayer, counseling and renewed inspiration to "get the victory." Everyone was expected to adopt "Prayerfulness," "teamworking!' and "loving interactions with others." It was only when people could not achieve the changes necessary that they might be offered TS status. One man explained TS as:

Some people joined the Family for Jesus. They saw something about the way it was being done had the right results. Like joining a political party you stick with it through thick and thin if you believe the principles are right. Some weren't so sure. They liked what we did but they wanted to do it their way. If the way they wanted to do it was fairly close to our way then they become T'S. If further away then they become one of the "Other Sheep."

According to Family members the general attitude is that TSers, however, are definitely not "backsliders"-a traditional Christian term used to describe people who relapse into sin or error, returning to old ways. As one member said:

We can't consider them as backsliders-they're our brothers and sisters. It depends on what they do, what they did when they left. We wouldn't condemn them. One woman was asked to become a TSer because she found it difficult to concentrate on her children, which meant they were a handful. One girl was constantly screaming and being naughty to the other kids. We tried to help her, tried to work with her about how to disciple them. She was very permissive with them saying, "They'll learn eventually." She was so dependent on other people doing the childcare

work for her. It was more helpful for her to be a TSer. It was affecting the other kids. We had to pray about what was best for the Home and what was best for the individual. We expect a certain standard in the Family ... She's much better now ... Very often it helps if people become TSer and they can spend more time with their own children. The 1989 "Tighten the Family" letter talked about people not putting their whole hearts into being disciples. Some couldn't.

Some TSers were defined as having a "difficulty," like naughty children, and this meant it was eventually considered better for them and the Home they lived in for them to leave. Not surprisingly, this carried with it some negativity and contributed to the status of the category as a whole, however much it is now emphasized that the shift to TS status was a matter of optimizing options.

To give an idea of figures, about 2000 people dropped away from the status of "disciple only" and life in a D.O. communal Home in 1989. There are no Family statistics relating to the number who became TS.

From the TS adults and the children's point of view the main reason being a DO has higher status is that disciples are serving the Lord 100%—some say 110%! The TS teens declare that "because of what they know about being a disciple when their parents were disciples they would still like to be DO." And to stress how little she appreciated being TS one girl added, "Some who leave the Family say they would rather be completely 'OUT' than be a TSer!" Another expressed her desire to become DO, wistfully sighing, "You can only try DO when you are 16 but we are all trying to think of ways of getting in earlier."

One of the attractions of being a DO is the training and learning from others in a Family Home—at Nelly's knee—rather than going to school. They said it was partly the enthusiasm of the group which carries you through. "In the Family if you are a good cook you teach others to cook; if you're a good teacher you teach others to teach. After 'school' we (4 jets and 4 teens) were each allowed to learn what we wanted, using our talents. I chose kitchen; some wanted to learn to type."

Life as a DO is seen as living with a standard, an ideal, something to work towards and something to do all the time which feels worthwhile. Life as a disciple is seen as a good training ground for life. As one man said, "Dale Carnegie, Vincent Pearl and James Dobson—they all say that the building of character is more determining of success than formal education, and that's what you get in the Family." One mother explained the teens' reluctance to pursue higher studies:

When I became a disciple I had to put all my university education in the garbage. I leamt more in my time with the Family than I did learning philosophy at University. At their age they want to learn, but their curiosity is different: they're at an age when music is important, things that are exciting ... and they want to do things that will be needed as a missionary—like childcare. They know what skills are needed when there are 30 kids and 12 adults in a home and that's what they want.

Though missionary life may have higher status, many of the adults describe the shift from DO to TS as "a blessing" whereas for their children "it's a let down." Sara summed up the extent to which the adults shift gear: as a TRF Supporter she had been determined to put aside several hours each day to learn the guitar, learn to type, do healthy exercises-things she had not had time to do as a disciple. She is still trying to find the time.

The following are examples of reasons given to me by TS adults for leaving full-time missionary life with the Family and becoming a TSer:

1. Working too much and too fast; I have a slow rhythm. The rhythm in The Family is very fast. Everyone is giving their ALL I needed to slow down.

2. I had some lessons to learn. I needed to slow down and learn what I needed to.

3. We had teenagers who want as much of the world as they can get; they want to leave the Family. They want to be able to watch as much TV as possible, wear the clothes they want, drink and smoke.

4. I felt I could be a better mother without people telling me how to do things. "I actually wanted to teach my own kids."

5. We had a lot to find out for ourselves.

6. We felt rebellious-had joined the Family when we were 18 and 19, so we had 18 years and 21 years in respectively. We needed a change.

7. The Family has changed. It became a lot stricter and tougher and more disciplined. There was a general standard and every aspect of life was covered with certain rules. We began to think we didn't agree and couldn't see the importance of all the little rules. Now I can, but I had to have my own conviction.

8. Not being able to sustain the sacrificial role of "learning to be a humble person who will fit in and do the job that has to be done rather than what you want to do."

The TS group highlights the intensity with which the DO's live, the extent to which they have religious fervour and sacrifice their own desires for the sake of the group as a whole.

To be in the Family you must know that's what you want. There is pressure living within the community. We try to make everyone happy and we have counsels (once a week). If someone is having a hard time we try to work it out. If you are outside the group you are more likely to be able to do what you want when you want to. Here you have to plan it more: you have to take the larger family into account. If you make the whole "home" as your "family," the other children "as your own" then it comes naturally and other mums do it for you too.

In the life of the TSer the locus of control shifts from the community to the individual. TSers themselves find it difficult to describe the shift, though the main emphasis is on learning how to live individually rather than learning how to live in harmony with others in community; they live with more freedom of choice, more time to reflect on options, time to reflect about themselves and about how to act, increased responsibility, learning to make new friends, the challenge of having to take the initiative.

How TSers Live

TRF Supporters no longer live at the core centre. They live on the periphery as lay members yet they share the culture of the Family, dominated by their religion, their dependence on the Bible, belief in the "Endtime," witnessing and serving the Lord. They can continue their dedication to saving souls, loving others and living lives led by prayer. They can make their own rules, decide their own routines and boundaries.

Given the freedom one might imagine that TSers would find a new meaning system for their lives or that at least the followers would change. The sources of coherence, however, for their new setting, and the ideology for their everyday lives remain very much the same. Serving the Lord 100% is still the ideal.

How is it that the TSers can let go of the high standards required by the Army of the Family and at the same time keep their faith in those standards? This has to do with the ideology itself. As we have seen, the admission of weaknesses and mistakes is part of the Family ideology. Everyone has "NWOS" (Needs Work On), everyone can be selfish, jealous, self-righteous, lacking in love. Admitting them is part of spiritual growth. It is acceptable to make mistakes-man is weak. The gap between reality and the ideology is explained. The belief is that everyone can work for the higher standards and they are to be found in the Word-that the Scriptures are:

…the divinely appointed standard and guide to our faith and practice. Holding fast this truth, that "all Scripture is given by the inspiration of C3rod, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness" (2 Timothy 3:16), we strive to study, memorize and obey it, that we may grow in faith, wisdom and spiritual strength. (From Family Statement of Faith)

In addition, change and experimentation are believed to be part of the process to perfection:

TO STAY ALIVE, EVERYONE MUST HAVE MOVE-MENT! There must be change, movement, motion ..

IF WE DON'T BREAK OUT OF THAT OLD OVER-STRETCHED BOTTLE WE'LL FIND OURSELVES IN A BOTTLENECK ...

I'VE GOT MORE FAITH FOR THE GUYS WITH ENOUGH GUMPTION TO BREAK OUT OF THAT OLD-BOTTLE mold of nothing but colony life. (ML "Old Bottles" No 242 1973)

TSers have seen the Family pass through many different stages and changes, Revolutions and New Eras (RNR, Chain of Cooperation, FFing, being sent home to families, mobile era, Fellow Revolution, etc.) (see Richardson and Davis, 1983). They have seen the Family through many experiments, and to some degree to be a TSer is just another experiment doing whatever is needed in "the Last Days," in a way that is more constructive for them as individuals and for the Family as a whole.

The extent to which TSers still live "by faith" is exemplified by the way they still pray before doing anything-going in a car, crossing a road, doing some work-either silently or openly ... and still seek to have their needs met by prayer. When they have needs many TSers will, for example, "work on them making a needs list, praying on them, saving for them, looking in a car boot sales, or 'provisioning' (asking someone in the 'system')." They believe "the Lord will provide" but this does not entail just sitting back and waiting; they actively set the goal before them in a way that many "self-improvement" courses would applaud. When the goal is achieved it is interpreted as a "blessing" and sometimes a "miracle." Children are taught to go to the Lord themselves if they have needs: "They that shall preach of the Gospel shall live of the Gospel"—i.e., if you're working for God he'll give you a salary. This kind of goal-oriented attitude encourages effective positive thinking which may also contribute to the particular enthusiasm for sticking to Family ideology.

The Children

The second generation of The Family are seen as God-given for His glory-to love and praise Him; they are the future of The Family. The children of TRF Supporters are also viewed as gifts from God but whereas in The Family there are strong directives from the leadership, as in the Discipleship Training Revolution (DTR) of 1991, TS parents must decide for themselves how to raise their children and the extent to which they encourage them to serve the Lord. For some TSers the chance to focus on their own children, without having to look after all the children of a Family Home, was a major reason for becoming a TSer; for others TS status brings with it "loss of a kind of training for my kids I can never give them myself." "There's a lot of care and energy poured into the kids but as a TSer it's all on your shoulders. You pray and the Lord provides. He still does miracles but you have all the responsibility."

Inevitably, TSers reveal different individual notions about how children should be raised. Many, however, feel they are still finding out what works best without the rules of the Family to guide them. In terms of younger children TSers still use the manual Raise 'em Right, a collection of condensations of books on how to raise happy, healthy and secure children. One parent described TS parents as facing a new situation in which they are only just beginning to find out what the problems are that arise, let alone the solutions. Their teens expect some advantages from being TSers. In principle, they think they can now dip into the youth culture of the "system" whenever they want to, listen to rock as much as they want. The parents know that their teens "want something exciting and strong," but how far should they let them go? She said:

At first we didn't want them to listen to any heavy rock music—the kind of music many of us used to listen to before joining the Family when we took acid. But of course they need music. And then we realized it was better to let them listen to rock but we said no to the black stuff, that kind of satanic music that talks about depressing feelings and suicide.

TSers have had to balance bringing up their children within the faith without lowering standards at the same time as allowing them the freedom they want-letting them wear the clothes they want, watch TV, drink alcohol, make the friends they want, go to State schools. They want to know what it is they will be giving up if they do become disciples.

Most TSers live in single family units although there are a few who have joined forces with one other family. Some have a son or daughter who has remained as a disciple in the Family. Children of TSers who were over 15 and who wanted to remain core members were allowed to remain as "DO" (Disciples only), spending some days a week with their parents but working primarily as missionaries.

Children of disciples who are over 15 and think they want to leave the Family may be given the opportunity of staying with a TS family for a few months, though I was told "they often want to keep the door open so they can go back to DO" if they decide not to leave. The age of decision is between the ages of 14 and 16, and some decide as early as 12. Members I talked to emphasized that teens themselves have to decide what they want to do. "There are teens that leave, about 10% at a guess, and some of those come back." Many of these will live with TSers for a while to see what it feels like to live outside the Family to take a paid job, to be independent, to have a "system" boy/girl-friend, to go out by themselves. Teens I spoke to said they might find it difficult to make a final commitment to the Family without knowing what it was like "on the other side." Living with a TSer family gives them this opportunity.

Only a minority of DO teens experiment with TS life. Conversely, children of TSers describe the life of the DO in positive terms, if not superlatives. The Family has brought excitement to the life of their DO teens with various projects, the latest in London being The Coffee Shop, an outreach organized and run by teens with as little supervision as possible from adults. It should be said that there are plans to incorporate some of the TS teens. The song and dance routines of The Family teens have become an increasingly significant part of their outreach as talents have been professionalized on videos and tapes. TSer teens have not failed to notice the kind of training that is now being given DO teens, as the future of the Family. The life of a disciple appears to the TS teen "as a big responsibility and as challenging." Although they can participate in the "system's" youth culture to the degree that their parents allow them, many consider there is even more excitement in the life of the DO teen.

When the children of TRF Supporters have reached the age of 16 and if they want to become full disciples, they have to find themselves what is termed a "guardian." They have to express in writing why they want to become disciples and their parents have to agree. These requests are sent to the World Services in Geneva where the likelihood of commitment is given full consideration before acceptance is finalized. At the time of my research there were three TS children in London old enough to become disciples, but all three had decided to remain TRF Supporters or join the "System." One was going to an aunt and uncle, ex-members in the US. None of them was against the Family: they simply "wanted to do their own thing." One TS girl, nearly old enough to become a disciple, wisely explained, "Sometimes you just want to do what your parent doesn't agree with at all. You want to be outrageous. Sometimes you just want to be bad, to break the rules." Others who could become disciples in a year or two were anxious to see if they could find ways to join earlier.

In Conclusion

The TRF Supporters reflect the degree to which the children in the Family are offered a choice to remain as a disciple, to try out the wider society by joining a TS family, or to leave the group completely. Several mothers expressed the view that they would be surprised if all their children wanted to remain as missionaries for the rest of their lives, and that the best way to test out uncertainty is to try TS life. Horton (1967) argues that people from a closed system cannot have consciousness of their own system. Similarly it is assumed that totalism produces highly committed followers (Balch in Robbins, 1979). The children in the Family have clear insights into their own "system" with a clear capacity to reflect about their lives and whether it is what they want. They look at their own life in comparison to others-the lives of those they witness to, those in the mass media, and those of TSers or disciples.

The TS-ers are also an attempt to solve several inherent problems of The Family. Firstly, the tension between loving fellowship, charity, the law of love and at the same time the view of the Family as an army fighting a very tough battle "we are God's elite troops we are warriors & must keep moving & fighting & dying for Jesus." (ML 1033.81)

Love is the Answer—The whole World's problems—political, economic, social, religious and physical could be solved through the love of God and each other! That's what we teach and preach, and that's our message, our life, our goal, our love, our everything: To love God, and our neighbors as ourselves. (ML, 633, 1981)

alongside:

We have to go into all the World & Preach the Gospel & we can't do it very well if we're dragged down by a bunch of time-taking, energy-draining, spirit-depressing, retarded and handicapped people.... this is an army and we're fighting a very tough battle. (ML 1033, 1981)

or

Well just tell them flat out that we want to eliminate all of the weak links, people who aren't really willing to pay the price.... I'm sick of these backsliders and traitors and sickening betrayers and lazy sitters instead of soldiers.... We still want quality, not mere quantity!—A determined Gideon's band of dedicated disciples and workers for the Lord!—not a bunch of do-nothing sitters! (ML 2527, 1989)

These apparently conflicting attitudes in The Family reflected in the Mo letters and the problem of how to deal with people who hold up the main goals, the other sheep who have their own ideas, and who do not change after years of loving encouragement have been given a solution by freeing them from the Army. Can we see TSers as part of a more general shift in the Family from totalism to an acceptance of individual needs and differences?

Charlotte Hardman is a Professor of Religious Studies at the University of Newcastle. She was formerly a director of INFORM, Great Britain's highly respected information center on alternative religions.